After RollOnFriday’s plea for the best lockdown haircut, a hirsute winner and his shocking barnet have been crowned.

Philip Deja, a partner at Streathers in Hampstead, sent in a stream of photos documenting his ordeal. He titled his masterpiece: "The Seven Stages of Lockdown Beard."

We unearthed this snap of pre-lockdown Philip, from Streathers’ website. Beautifully coiffured hair, lovingly dashed with brylcream. It's the smile of a man who had recently felt the steely-touch of a hairdresser's scissors chipping away at his locks. A different, distant time:

Philip 1

What follows is a record of Philip's descent in lockdown, sans barber and possibly trapped in his bathroom. It's a moving portrait of 2020 man. We are all Philip.

The first few stages gallop along at a genteel pace, as our hairy hero demonstrates some deft sculpting:


Stage 1, The Hitler Chaplin 

Pic 2

Stage 2, Lord Kitchener wants you to have your bowels blown out at the Somme

Pic 3b

Stage 3, A Walrus

Pic 4

Stage 4, The Twits (sardines and cornflakes hidden in the hairy jungle)

But at stage 5, and without warning, the hair takes a wild turn:

Here's johnny

Stage 5, Heeeere's Johnny (police called)

Pic 6 b

Stage 6, Brian Blessed (House surrounded)

But there is a peaceful conclusion, as Philip appears to have found some kitchen scissors and tidied up:   

Stage 7

Stage 7, Back to the Zoom calls with clients 

Philip told RollOnFriday: "Woah. I feel like it was all worth it. The last eighteen years of my legal training and career to date, I mean. Thanks so much - this has made my lockdown."

For being crowned the champion and surviving the seven stages, RollOnFriday has sent Philip a bottle of gin to swig on the sofa along with a packet of Frazzles.

Tip Off ROF


Pognophobe 19 June 20 08:55

The perfect story for those who like Deja view.  Though the pictures are of him shaving the beard off not growing it.

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