Lawyer to the (speeding) stars Nick "Mr Loophole™" Freeman caused a stink this week after making some glib, offensive and embarrassing comments on "provocatively-dressed" women.

In a blog piece in the Manchester Evening News, Freeman - who makes it clear that he abhors rape (thanks for clearing that up, Nick) - states that "as a red-blooded alpha male" he believes "how a woman dresses (and behaves in that dress) tells a man what's on her mind". He continues "in the real world, a woman who behaves or dresses in a sexually provative way conveys a certain message. A message that, ironically, can victimise men". Poor old Nick, always the victim.

Realist Freeman realises "many women may baulk at [his] assessment", noting that those who took part in Manchester's recent Slut Walk "claimed women should be able to wear whatever they like in public". But he disagrees with this analysis, and - taking his cues from Benny Hill - has particular issues with fishnet tights, stilettos and - worst of all - "racy red underwear".

Ban this sick filth, says Mr Loophole

The full car crash of a blog can be read here. Check out his leering approach to Nancy D'ell Olio, and his description of the time where it took "every fibre of willpower" and "tender legal training" not to jump on a woman who had changed her mind. As he said, "to have ignored her wishes would have been rape". Nick Freeman, ever the gentleman...