Sounds like you re hearing the call of the wild ...Home Counties m8

*the trains are shoite tho*

Not wherever you live.

Some parts of London are really rather nice.

greatestcityintheworldetc

"IF it wasnt for work and friends and activities"

Erm...

The country is great but does need to work on the availability of takeaways and Deliveroo.

Your bit isnt strutz (have been stuck on a train here for 40 mins and now going back to previous stop).  spotted some hockey pitches tho so I can see the attraction for you.

You’re stuck on a train so my bit of London isn’t nice?

Curious logic.

In fact I rather take the view that if the trains are down I have 2 other ways of getting in that take almost exactly the same time.

Did you wave at Miss strutter as you passed those fields?  Nice bits of London you see, so convenient for some really excellent schools.

I tend not to wave at young girls from the windows of public transport.  I just have this whole not being a massive pervert thing going on right now.  

I don't expect you to understand.

Still travelling in then - how long has that been now? 2 and a bit hours?

Never mind, hopefully it won’t be the same going back out again.

I believe I shall be leaving the desolate wasteland you call home imminently. I've passed my regards to your brother - his box is looking very cosy.

They’ve re-routed you via Hertfordshire? Good god, the trains are screwed today.

Is it not your brother by the Lidl?  next to the bins?  he is the very spit of you.

They really have rerouted that train haven’t they as there is certainly no Lidl in my part of town.

do you ever think this

No because I left London almost a decade ago and now live near the seaside.

Cripes, has it been that long dusty?

Doesn’t time get away with you eh?

There actually is strutz.  am amazed a miser of your prominence is unaware.

Doesn’t time get away with you eh?

Well, if we are being ever so accurate it's been just over 8 years but why not round it up? Luckily, I still look as youthful as I did then ;)

Funny how much has changed in that time. Bought flat, met Mr D, moved in with Mr D, sold flat, bought house, got married...time flies.

An internet search reveals that the closest one is 2 miles away (and certainly not visible from any train line of which I am aware).

Definitely not my part of town dear boy.

And you dusty remain gorgeous of course.

Ha. Why does it sound everso sarcastic coming from you, Struts.... :p

I would never be sarcastic to you dusty - I respect and fear you far too much.

Now wang on the other hand.....,

I really like it. Loads of stuff to do (with or without kids), got the v and a kids museum down the road

The primary my 4 yr old goes to seems so much better funded and resourced than any school that my wife's mates' kids go to outside of the m25 (despite similar ofstead ratings)

Wouldn't suit me to live in a little middle class enclave. It's also easier to get anywhere else in the country than most places 

are these two ^ seriously arguing whether there is a lidl nearby strutts house that devaluates the location?

Of course we aren’t. We are just two veteran roffers who know each other pretty well busting balls and killing time whilst wang was sitting on a train.

Struts I really admire your commitment to penning newer and more obscure euphemisms 

What bam said (except for the school, we’re not up to that bit yet). 

My 2year olds favourite place to visit is the science museum, which is just down the road. And which is fricking awesome and I am happy to pootle around as often as he wants. Walk back home via Hyde park and a play on the pirate ship. What’s not to like?! 

‘busting balls’ is hardly obscure, have you never seen The Sopranos, Zoolander or Goodfellas, to name but 3 cases off the top of my head where the expression was widely employed?

Exactly. Taking a well used phrase and manipulating it to cover what you and Wang get up to. Amazing 

Same with sitting on a train.

Still trying to work out what killing time could mean 

Bam u should see our live show.

Especially the bit featuring trombs.

./.

btw strutz got Zoolander, the sopranos and goodfellas from that flea market up the rd from him. £2.10.

Haggled down from £2.50.

I am the god of bargain - bow down and worship me you loose fingered mortals.

I am the god of bargain

Dropped your prices as well, eh?

For you, completely free of charge will always be my price 

*apart from any requests that stray from the standard package

got your back bro

Moved out of London (SW6) to Oxon a while ago and exited the EC4 firm at the same time.

Bought a small farm and was spending prob 2 days each week in the old firm's City office. Have since taken early retirement and am now failing as a hobby farmer.

Heh @ wang

That dwarf is feeling neglected, chaps. 

Bam, I went to that V&A kids museum recently.

i thought it really shit, my nephew was not keen either. 

was it better once you had done a quick line? 

I hear that is the best way to do museums