Never wake up cold
Someone else does your cleaning
Someone to find you quickly if you get murdered
If something breaks it's someone else's problem
Room service
Nice bed linen but you don't have to worry if you get chocolate on it
Hotels ftw
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also free shower gel
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Con:
rooms are small
lighting is terrible.
noise in the hallway.
I hate trouser presses.
those crappy tiny kettles.
Plug sockets in the wrong place.
shite TVs
the noise of the A/C.
hotel breakfasts are boring by day 5.
every surface in your room has some of the alt-right Roferati's cum on it.
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Hello - can you send someone from house-keeping up, please? I've managed to get.. some.. well, I suppose chocolate (?) on my bedsheets. Yes, again. No, I promise it really is chocolate this time.
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Con:
other people's filth
not my own bed
not my own pillow
aircon
small room
generally uncomfortable
crap telly
crap wifi
crap shower
Pro:
nope
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ooooh, Woo and I are ad idem.
sometimes the shower can be good - but the crap teeny bottles of Moulton Brown are an arse to extract the shampoo etc. from. And then, out of frustration at the slow ooze, you give it a squeeze and end up with 3 showers' worth of shampoo in one go.
Recall once being asked to pay £7 for 24hrs broadband in a Travelodge in Birmingham NEC. fook ORF.
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A nice sea view. Over there. Between the land and the sky.
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Not if you end up in e.g. the hotel's water tank. There'd be a little bit of Clergs in everybody.
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I once stayed in a hotel in Lancashire that offered me "an ocean view" room.
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You and woo pick gash hotels! Pick a nice one. I have many recommendations to sell you.
Never sleep better than in a big hotel bed.
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Although I agree re tiny molton brown
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I think this really depends on the quality of the hotel.
Standard, chain-owned business arrangement: vile mediocrity
Boutique number with excellent service: quite possibly rather enjoyable for a period of time
The Savoy: lifetime shagfest
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Re crap telly, justcast your android to the tv
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Depends on the hotel, surely?
If the bed is big and comfortable, there is no noise from neighbouring rooms, you can unplug the AC and the breakfast is good, then I could happily hang out in a hotel for ages.
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Agree that it depends on the hotel. Especially if a nice one by a beach in a hot climate
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Does casting your phone turn a 32" HD LCD (made by a Chinese brand you've never heard of like Tundicaichi) from 2008 into a 55" 4K OLED with surround speakers?
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In summing up, unless you're in a presidential suite at a 7 star mega lux hotel somewhere amazing, a house that you spec as you want will always win.
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Tbf, we are currently trying to make our bedroom/living room a mashup of all the best hotels we've ever stayed in.
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Are you attaching low voltage hairdryer to the wall and ensuring the lighting is too low to do anything that requires the use of eyes.
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I used to work with a guy who lived in a hotel. It was cheaper than a reasonably sized flat. And I think he liked the range of services on offer in the hotel bar of an evening.
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Applied to mega lux hotel/presidential suite my list would not be really different:
Con:
other people's filth - yup
not my own bed - yup (although ironically I sleep in a Westin Heavenly bed at home)
not my own pillow - yup
aircon - yup
small room - ok, maybe not
generally uncomfortable - ok, maybe not
crap telly - probably same
crap wifi - probably same
crap shower (this has to do with water pressure. reckon even the mega lux hut will have this issue)
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I stayed in a hotel once where there was a local water shortage, so the first floor rooms had water from 6am to 7:30am and the ground floor from 7:30 to 9:00. Then both had water until 11, then none until 5. fooking ridic.
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I never wake up cold anyway, someone else does my cleaning anyway, I don’t regard being murdered as a realistic concern and I like privacy. Hotel life is not for me.
BTW u used “chocolate” as code for jizz right
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Every shower I have used over the past few weeks has been AMAZING
rrrr amazing.
WiFi better than home, TV literally what I watch at home because of the casting.
I don't see how you could afford a house done up like a properly nice hotel (I wouldn't have those speakers anyway because of neighbours).
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Laz what colour so you think jizz is supposed to be??
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do u live in a house connected to another persons house? like on those soap operas that poor people watch?
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Hotel buffet breakfasts!
I would have three courses every day though and bloat
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No because I live in a country where you are allowed to have proper plug sockets in bathrooms. ;-)
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ask not what colour is the jizz m88, ask what colour are the sheets
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The only proper plug socket is the IEC Type G. It is used in the UK, Ireland, Cyprus, Malta, Malaysia, Singapore and Hong Kong (and a very few other places).
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Not in bathrooms, it ain't.
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I've only listed the main countries where it's the main type.
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I don’t know who Elaine Stritch is But I have lived in the Savoy for a few months in the past, paid for by a company, and I think the cheapest room available was about £460 a night so I fail to understand how that can be cheaper than a mortgage, or even renting for that matter.
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Wouldn’t the novelty wear off after about 11 minutes?
Then you realise you’re living in a small square box next to lots of other identical small square boxes.
If you listen carefully you can hear the polish cleaning ladies speculating about what exactly the Scottish guest in room 214 does to generate those bed linen marks as well.
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It would be ace for about 3 weeks.
But long term, no urg!
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Hotel rooms generally only have a bed and some kind of upright desk chair. There is nowhere to sit comfortably and recline whilst relaxing as you can with a good armchair or sofa.
Ever seen it when Gordon Ramsay shines a UV light over hotel rooms on Hotel Nightmares? At least with my own bed I know where all the bodily fluids came from.
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When I am sitting naked on that chair, furious relaxing, I often wonder who else has done the same.
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The Fast and The Furious 14: Tokyo Tug
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Yeah the whole bodily fluids thing triggers the hell out of me. Also my own bed is much more comfortable than anything I have experienced in a hotel. I don’t have to clean and I don’t have to change my bed linen at home. The only real advantage is room service but I can get my housekeeper to cook for me if I desperately wanted her to.
There’s no place like home. *clicks ruby shoes together*
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I never sit in a chair to relax
I find it innately unrelaxing
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I lived in the Savoy for nearly a month. It was fine but even that got boring. If I had a suite it would have been better - you spend too much time in bed otherwise.
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Of course you do
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Try staying somewhere other than a sh1tty 1* hotel, maybe?
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I thought that was Teclis?! How many drug-addled Rofers with tall tales are living in the Savoy at any one time?
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Mine was closer to three months dux. And my drugs are all prescribed thank you very much.
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I spent a while living in my club.
would recommend apart from the vast expansion in waistline
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Dux likes posh hotels because there's a better class of someone else's jizz on the pillow.
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Clubbers was that intra or inter marriage?
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after marriage number 1.
before I moved in with an ex and her husband.
before she then moved in with me.
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I once stayed in a hotel Mon-Fri for 3 months when I was working on a large conspiracy to supply Class A drugs trial.
It was fun initially - the food was ok, the bed was reasonably comfortable and I got to go to the gym every day.
Plus points -
Not having to worry about cleaning.
Not having to worry about cooking.
Reasonably comfortable bed.
Occasionally meeting interesting people in the bar, especially married 30 something women who were in town for business meetings and blatantly bored with life.
Minus points -
Having to live out of a single room if you want privacy.
Difficult to eat healthily.
The bar is really tempting.
Missing home comforts.
Occasional issues with cleanliness.
In summary, if you are in a king size room in MalMaison in Oxford it can be ok. If you are in Coventry Premier Inn it's miserable.
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malmaison is where regional sales directors go to have affairs. Everything is dark, purple and spaff-encrusted.
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A while ago I was involved in a class action in which I was required to stay 4 days a week in various parts of the country, for about 4 months or so.
The PAs generally booked the hotels having sent you a link first. They were all rather nice with good food and facilities. At first it was novel being cooked,and cleaned for etc, but it soon became very boring. It’s embarrassing just how much mess one can make in a hotel on their own , the sort of mess you can never make at home .
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On balance liked it for a month, would do it for up to six months for work abroad, after that would prefer other options.
I spent a month living in a Marriott for work, in a suite with a reasonable kitchenette, and with access to the hotel pool via a guest lift so it was possible to get there in togs and bathrobe.
It is absolutely lovely to have someone make your bed every day and dust and tidy and change your sheets.
When someone else cleans the place thoroughly every day it is possible to eat healthily in a suite without feeling like you are living in a nest of your own litter.
The pool was the best part of it until I went there in an evening instead of the morning and saw that the local escorts were using girlish high spirits frolicking in the pool basically as a way to disinfect their fat hotel guest clients before touching them.
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I had a month in a hotel when on foreign secondo and the trainee flat lease expired without anyone realising.
Was great.
Pool, clean, must have been caught naked about every other day by room service which satisfied by flashing tendencies without getting arrested
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I like a malmaison , the showers are great
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*makes note*
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