Do it. Now, they can’t afford to waste time. Please copy and paste emailed expressions of thanks. 

You absolutely should 

*ding

Ah, there's my popcorn ready, just in time

will you at the same time be offering any of them an in vivo alternative? would be polite. 

I don't really fancy any of them tbh, and am in any event happily married, so no.  

The same thing presumably applies if, say, you get an email from someone wanting to rehome their cat.

Happily married, you say?

hmmmmm

You should definitely forward this.  A sensitive covering note along the lines of your OP would help.  And you should certainly explain you don't fancy any of them.

"You're never going to get up the duff so this is your next best option. No need to thank me."

Can't think of a single downside to forwarding this on.

In fact, why not forward on to the entire firm? We wouldn't want anyone else missing out.

"FYI for all ladies out there seeking an extension of time", I think for your cover email. Short and to the point.

Could you add some sort of countdown clock and limited time offer wording to be sure they don't miss out and later regret it.

Have the 'Countdown' timer play as they read it.