I know I'm Cleaver.

That's why people leave it to me...

On occasion. Can also be jaw-droppingly stupid, although it's rarer these days.

Overall, 6/10, could do better. 

I don't get this joke

which may influence my own answer to the op

dice junior is beginning to make me feel more stupid than I would like

Acht if he's so smart why can't he buy his own beer eh

not just clever.

big, too.

I'm good with people (aka dumb AF).

Your not you're, duh

As Blackadder said, I try not to fly in the face of popular opinion. 

I can pick a pencil up off the floor without using my hands.

I’m a real clever dick.

If people don't know me very well they think I'm clever. I look like I'm thinking hard because I don't understand what they are saying. I walk quickly around the office to give the impression of rapid thought.  

Thinking gives you wrinkles 

yes

nice Beaver joke from Ash there .

When I read a lengthy High Court Judgment, I realise that reached my rightful position as a provincial solicitor.

when I write a lengthy High Court Judgment, I barely need to get out of second gear.

No. Knowledgable in certain areas, but that’s just memory/recall. Sometimes quick witted. But that’s probably about it. Means if I’m pissed off I can argue pretty well. Otherwise? Not really. 

Why would I read judgments?  Trainees, junior lawyers and PSLs exist to read and summarise them.

Plus they’re not really very important in banking and finance…..

No ofc not. The first sign of wisdom is knowing that you don’t know anything. 

It's relative and manifests itself in different ways.

A costs lawyer (this area of practice is well beyond my abilities) has a different kind of cleverness to the cabbie who has 'The Knowledge'.

Someone who knows the Companies Act 2006 inside out has a different kind of cleverness to a skilled draughtsman.

Concert pianists who play without a scoresheet have a different kind of cleverness to someone who has a knack for languages.

Myself, average.

Yes but only in a way that is not particularly useful. 

Winning the Krypton Factor, though, just makes someone a prat.

Well. Quite. And that could be just the start (Google is your friend)

The only opinion that matters is my mother's.

I’m like an amazing parrot… I mimic the intelligence  of others exceedingly well. 
 

I remember everything but I lack any form of original creative thinking. 

No.  I have pockets of arcane knowledge that can be mistaken for erudition, but I'm not quick-witted or particularly intelligent.

Ok to confirm, everyone here is relatively clever. Some not nearly so clever as they think (but clever enough to do false modesty). Others (largely the ladies) clever but too aware of the world and too self doubting to feel comfortable asserting it. You don't need to be the MOST clever to be clever, plus ofc cleverness comes in different specialisms and I refuse to allow a physics hegemony to establish itself AGAIN. Word cleverness counts.

Re quick wittedness sometimes slow cooked wit is better anyway.

Re quick wittedness sometimes slow cooked wit is better anyway

I like this idea, but would still take quick wit any day.

Good point about relativity.  I am judging myself against the number of people I've met who are smarter than me.

Yeah confirmation bias. Think of the guys who can't understand really basic things. There are loads of them. If you were average the world would be a MUCH better place.