Child friendly resort recommendations

Somewhere nice like Tenerife or Lanzarote 

No Tabithas and tarquins 

Late summer break 

Need kids club(s) and activities but close enough to nice restaurants etc 

Ideally a three bed suite or connecting rooms, hotel not villa 

Budget - this is rof....


Run different events every hour so they can pick what they want to do. Also football pitches and tennis courts. Ours didn't do loads of it , because they like hangin out with us luckily, but it's great

Tbh we basically left resort to go to the marina. Quite nice. The beach , 100 metres away and the volcano (amazing)

Buffet breakfast good. Very good

Can confirm Princessa Yaiza is great if you're a working class lad and just want to relax somewhere nice with dece food while the kids have a whale of a time. Playa Blanca has some A* grade Brits abroad "Irish pubs" to watch the football in too.

Iberostar Anthelia in Tenerife also fantastic for the same things except the booze is different class there. 

Yaiza is way less good since covid (the fish tanks are still all empty for eg) but if your kids are 5+ there's an amazing all day football camp that my eldest bloody loved 

Gran Meliá Pqlacio de Isora

Only bit of your spec that it’s not super hot on is proximity to restaurants outside the hotel. There’s a small town nearby (Alcala) but it’s not much. Cab ride to Las Americas / Los Cristianos.

Sani Resort in halkidiki (greece) is genuinely lovely. Not close to a proper town but has plenty of restaurants spread across the hotels.. Pricing has gone a bit mental since Covid though (even by rof standards). 

Bazza I already have breaks to camber sands and bognor this year 

Just wanted something a bit further afield as going for a longer period 

Thanks Laz - looks good 

What’s this shite about not wanting to see tats on holidays. I’m very happy to see tats, if they’re on a bikini-clad hardbody. Big fan of the gym-honed fvck-ready mirrored sunglasses bad girl look 

They have a converted VW camper van vending ice lollies

They also have (a) a comprehensive and good quality wine menu and (b) will deliver your desserts to your Villa if you're with young kids and don't have time to have dessert before they get cranky and tired ("order the desserts that you both want and we'll deliver them to where you're staying in an hour").

Great service, great food, great drink