Do you have it? If yes, has it shaped your life much? If no, do you feel bad for people who have it or do you think the annoying whiners should pull themselves together more?
I think without anxiety I'd be a totally different person living a totally different life. I assume it would be better but then maybe an abundance of caution is what has kept me out of lady prison.
Anxiety is definitely why my career hasn't been very exciting (I find it more interesting than I would have found an exciting one, though). The charming you have to do and the schmoozing and the just being present at the right times were intolerable. I knew what had to be done and I couldn't face it.
My trainee once asked me why I wasn't getting anxious about a particularly stressful closing. I paraphrased Bruce Banner: "That's my secret. I'm always anxious."
Anxiety has plagued my working life and part of the reason I moved away from City Law, but I am now starting to let it go, finally realising none of this shit really matters.
Also always been worried too much about the wrong things i.e. doing a good job for the client, while not caring enough about things that impact me personally far more - internal politics, hours, finances, marketing etc etc.
Only in the short term in the sense that i'm listening to the wind howling outside and thinking "feck I'm going sailing in this tomorrow" but will be fine after I've been dumped through the first few waves and given up trying to be dry.
Going out tomorrow which is meant to be better than today but still gusting force 7. We generally keep racing until committee abandons it although there's the odd time we bail as the race won't make any difference to the overall results so there's no point damaging stuff for the sake of it.
I don't think anxious people should just "pull themes together". Anxious people haven't learned and embedded successful strategies. Pretty sure they don't choose to be this way.
Anyone saying otherwise it's probably a hanners type who can't see the gifts they were given from "go" and are too stupid to /stubborn to recognise it now
There is no way to remove anxiety from yourself beyond a certain developmental stage IMO, you can merely learn to manage it. I know medication can help up to a point but eventually anxiety becomes part of (fused with) the self, not just a disease we live with.
I do a lot of things that, for me, are very brave. I've had some adventures and pushed myself to hurt because I feel angry at the idea of a life part lived thanks to what's sort of an emotional disability.
But I avoid SO much and have missed out on so many things even so. I know that people who don't experience anxiety can't understand it at all. It blew my mind when I first realised not everyone feels this way. Anxious people are anxious about different things (eg work doesn't particularly bother me) but we can see the pain in the other contexts for other people. Non anxious people just think we're being arseholes and what's the big deal.
You embrace it and grow through the experiences and become less anxious over time.
So a footballer in his third champions league final is less anxious than the 18 year old wonder kid.
Medical stuff is different - I don’t pretend to understand that and where the boundary sits between medical mental health problems and the normal emotional rollercoaster of life. Not sure the medical community knows either.
It's easier to say none of it matters at 45+ because you've made some way in life. At 21 anxiety will define you because of the aversions it engenders. It doesn't matter so much if a menopausal lawyer can't face a client drinks event. If a trainee can't then it's probably going to curtail their career options considerably. The horror of leaving uni and learning that, actually, your cleverness isn't that useful. Only your willingness to play a particular game in a particular way.
I am happy with my niche, mostly, and treasure the lovely kind friends who have been with me along the way. But I am sad for the life I might have had if I weren't in too much pain to reach out for it.
So much anxiety as a teenager. It somehow resolved itself when I had my first child. I don’t know the psychology behind it, but things that had previously given me anxiety suddenly became inconsequential.
I can relate. My career has been respectable enough, but would have been (at least) more enjoyable were it not for debilitating anxiety and imposter syndrome.
I'd always taken it as a personal failing, that I hadn't (to paraphrase the OP) pulled myself together more. But then I had a child, who was practically born anxious, and I now think it's immutable to a very large extent.
Dementia doesn't bother me. I've got all the risk factors besides obesity and smoking so it's a shoe in. Shoo in. Whatever. Try to die of something else first. Not giving up sugar that's for sure.
I have to believe that anxiety isn't a permanent state of affairs that can't be solved for.
I think I'm definitely less anxious than I was in a lot of areas. Sometimes I look back and can't even understand why I was so afraid which is a very weird space to be in
In other things (work especially) I feel very anxious and I have hardly made a dent.
The work anxiety has probably cut my salary on half to what it might have been.
I see anxiety and depression as a normal and healthy response to life . It is often depressing and anxiety inducing and we all share one big anxiety at the end of it - death. Which our modern culture weirdly denies and treats like an unfortunate incident like a car crash when it happens to someone, which I find spectacularly unhelpful.
I have stopped taking sertraline after I forgot to take it on holiday and noted no significant ill effects which to me proved it was a placebo /that the chemical serotonin theory is a load of BS
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I think without anxiety I'd be a totally different person living a totally different life. I assume it would be better but then maybe an abundance of caution is what has kept me out of lady prison.
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Yes, I think I am too anxiety-prone to be truly successful in the conventional "career" sense. But I am happy with how my life has turned out so far.
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Anxiety is definitely why my career hasn't been very exciting (I find it more interesting than I would have found an exciting one, though). The charming you have to do and the schmoozing and the just being present at the right times were intolerable. I knew what had to be done and I couldn't face it.
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That said, I don't like people who live those lives on the whole. So would I want to spend endless time with them? No
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Constantly.
My trainee once asked me why I wasn't getting anxious about a particularly stressful closing. I paraphrased Bruce Banner: "That's my secret. I'm always anxious."
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Anxiety has plagued my working life and part of the reason I moved away from City Law, but I am now starting to let it go, finally realising none of this shit really matters.
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Paralyzed with anxiety or blase to the point of hazard.
A bit like a Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde composed of Egon the Ghostbuster and Jack Sparrow the pirate
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Also always been worried too much about the wrong things i.e. doing a good job for the client, while not caring enough about things that impact me personally far more - internal politics, hours, finances, marketing etc etc.
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It’d have to be a no from me on the anxiety thing.
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Only in the short term in the sense that i'm listening to the wind howling outside and thinking "feck I'm going sailing in this tomorrow" but will be fine after I've been dumped through the first few waves and given up trying to be dry.
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You seriously going out in this Sails?
Id always taken you for more a gentleman sailor.
Respect
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Going out tomorrow which is meant to be better than today but still gusting force 7. We generally keep racing until committee abandons it although there's the odd time we bail as the race won't make any difference to the overall results so there's no point damaging stuff for the sake of it.
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Yes and yes and yes to clause one
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I don't think anxious people should just "pull themes together". Anxious people haven't learned and embedded successful strategies. Pretty sure they don't choose to be this way.
Anyone saying otherwise it's probably a hanners type who can't see the gifts they were given from "go" and are too stupid to /stubborn to recognise it now
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There is no way to remove anxiety from yourself beyond a certain developmental stage IMO, you can merely learn to manage it. I know medication can help up to a point but eventually anxiety becomes part of (fused with) the self, not just a disease we live with.
I do a lot of things that, for me, are very brave. I've had some adventures and pushed myself to hurt because I feel angry at the idea of a life part lived thanks to what's sort of an emotional disability.
But I avoid SO much and have missed out on so many things even so. I know that people who don't experience anxiety can't understand it at all. It blew my mind when I first realised not everyone feels this way. Anxious people are anxious about different things (eg work doesn't particularly bother me) but we can see the pain in the other contexts for other people. Non anxious people just think we're being arseholes and what's the big deal.
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I mean how can you imagine existing in a state of fear if you never have?
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Never suffered from anxiety and was always a bit impatient with those that did tbh
Then menopause kicked in and it hit me like a ton of bricks.
Helps that all of my friends are either similarly menopausal/going through health issues leading to major anxiety so we all keep each other going.
Just breathe and remind yourself that none of it matters
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Doesn’t everybody experience anxiety?
Just like everybody gets nervous.
You embrace it and grow through the experiences and become less anxious over time.
So a footballer in his third champions league final is less anxious than the 18 year old wonder kid.
Medical stuff is different - I don’t pretend to understand that and where the boundary sits between medical mental health problems and the normal emotional rollercoaster of life. Not sure the medical community knows either.
Law jobs can definitely be highly stressful
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It's easier to say none of it matters at 45+ because you've made some way in life. At 21 anxiety will define you because of the aversions it engenders. It doesn't matter so much if a menopausal lawyer can't face a client drinks event. If a trainee can't then it's probably going to curtail their career options considerably. The horror of leaving uni and learning that, actually, your cleverness isn't that useful. Only your willingness to play a particular game in a particular way.
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I am happy with my niche, mostly, and treasure the lovely kind friends who have been with me along the way. But I am sad for the life I might have had if I weren't in too much pain to reach out for it.
Still, nearly the holiday weekend.
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Anxiety has debilitated me into not living a life . I will reflect this on my deathbed i am sure
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Do you mean professionally or personally?
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Swimming pools mainly. Flashbacks of the 50m backstroke. The reverb. It's hot. I want to escape. Guards in yellow t-shirts with whistles. Accusatory.
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So much anxiety as a teenager. It somehow resolved itself when I had my first child. I don’t know the psychology behind it, but things that had previously given me anxiety suddenly became inconsequential.
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Personally
I don't really GAF about professionally tbh that's dull
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I can relate. My career has been respectable enough, but would have been (at least) more enjoyable were it not for debilitating anxiety and imposter syndrome.
I'd always taken it as a personal failing, that I hadn't (to paraphrase the OP) pulled myself together more. But then I had a child, who was practically born anxious, and I now think it's immutable to a very large extent.
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I agree - loads of pictures of me and my anxious friends as babies sitting around with hugely anxious looks on our faces like o God what's next
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There is a bulging mental cupboard where all my anxiety is nicely tucked away. Hopefully it doesn't break open in before I die.
And that's something new to add.
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It's normal to have anxiety . It's only if it's actually materially cost you life experiences that it's a real problem.
I don't believe it can be medicated away either in any real sense
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https://zoe.com/learn/podcast-exploring-dementia?lid=j47w0xzqrmay
This will make anyone anxious
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Dementia doesn't bother me. I've got all the risk factors besides obesity and smoking so it's a shoe in. Shoo in. Whatever. Try to die of something else first. Not giving up sugar that's for sure.
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I have to believe that anxiety isn't a permanent state of affairs that can't be solved for.
I think I'm definitely less anxious than I was in a lot of areas. Sometimes I look back and can't even understand why I was so afraid which is a very weird space to be in
In other things (work especially) I feel very anxious and I have hardly made a dent.
The work anxiety has probably cut my salary on half to what it might have been.
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It absolutely varies by person and context but I think it tends towards he endogenous
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I am weirdly anxious about some things - like being on time - but generally am pretty chilled
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People who care about being on time are just good people
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I think medication can help. When you're anxious your brain has been hijacked. Medication can help make the hijack less frequent or less intense.
I take ritalin. It helps.
Also, it has other amazing side effects :
I can see in colour
I can imagine photo/video quality images
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Rham: what would you have done but for the anxiety?
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Absolutely what Queenie said. Hit me like a train about 6 months ago and was ruinous.
It has improved, but it is not solved.
I find it quite mad and frustrating.
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I see anxiety and depression as a normal and healthy response to life . It is often depressing and anxiety inducing and we all share one big anxiety at the end of it - death. Which our modern culture weirdly denies and treats like an unfortunate incident like a car crash when it happens to someone, which I find spectacularly unhelpful.
I have stopped taking sertraline after I forgot to take it on holiday and noted no significant ill effects which to me proved it was a placebo /that the chemical serotonin theory is a load of BS
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The sickness unto death
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Keep buggering on OB x
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