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Lawyers have recalled their favourite typos which transformed mundane documents into smutty confessions, insults, and nonsense.
The disclosures on the RollOnFriday Discussion Board were prompted by a recent story about a partner who warned his staff not to make mistakes in an email which was itself laden with errors.
A solicitor said his top pick was a letter from another firm which described the matter at stake as a "2.5 acre shite at Melrose".
Other lawyers recalled emails stating, "I know you are very busty", "Please poop into my office", "I enclose a daft coypu for your review", and, "Thank you for sending over the draft at such short notice. We will review it tonight and come on it in the course of tomorrow".
One solicitor said he took pity on his opposition when they referred to their client's "loss of her night shits" in her claim form, and telephoned to advise them that it "might be an idea to add an 'f' before sending it in the trial bundle".
Highlights cited by lawyers included:
- a company described as being "Incorporated under the jaws of the Cayman Islands"
- the suggestion that "this matter is suitable for medication"
- 20 debt claims addressed to "Birmingham Cunty Court"
- At the end of an email "riddled with errors of grammar, punctuation, law and fact", the invitation to "please call me if you wish to discuss father".
Some mistakes were more deliberate than others. A poster on the Discussion Board admitted sending German counsel a letter in September 2001 which stated in "in tiny leetle letters" in the footer, "england5germany1".
A senior associate went to more extreme lengths and typed 'C**T' (without the asterisks) in giant letters across emails to opposing counsel, selecting a white font to ensure invisibility. Disaster struck when the matter unexpectedly became contentious and "somehow the text became visible during disclosure". "Words were had", but the culprit is now a partner - albeit at a different firm.
It appears some departments aren’t above a tactical typo. A lawyer described "a standing order in our property team that whenever writing to a certain partner at a rival firm, the letter had to be signed off, 'We look forward to hearing from you shorty'. Apparently it used to wind him up massively".
However, unintentional rudeness was more common. One lawyer said he never heard back from a senior credit officer called Angus when, "as a very fresh faced junior, I wrote an email (cc'd to plenty)", which began, "Dear Anus".
Other instances of document disaster included the lawyer whose spell check automatically amended the request, "Ask Leslina Jones to join us", to, "Ask lesbian Jones to join us" (not her actual surname), and the solicitor cited in the Law Gazette whose secretary corrected 'ipso facto' to the far more direct, "if so, fatso".
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