Sham's hunt for LinkedIn clout ends with a bang.
A boss at the UK's Nuclear Decommissioning Authority has criticised a barrister for recommending nuking Russia.
Sham Uddin, a lawyer (and entertainer) who bills himself as the 'Bengal Tiger', announced his hawkish position on LinkedIn, where he lists his jobs as "self-employed barrister" and "full-time tiger".
"I am convinced Putin is going to go for the nuclear option", mused Uddin. "The West must launch a pre-emptive nuclear attack on Russia first. A man who does not care about his own citizens he ain’t gonna care about the citizens of rest of the world".
"If I was in charge I would launch a pre-emptive nuclear attack on Russia tonight", declared Uddin, who advertises himself as a mediator on the networking platform.
Uddin, who is not in charge, received little support for his alpha stance.
"Mutually assured destruction it is then", said one poster.
"Blimey….A pre-emptive nuclear strike on Russia from the UK would mean that our missiles would hit about 10 minutes after theirs against us launched...Not the best idea I have ever heard", said another.
"The only place in the United Kingdom I do not think that Putin will attack is Scotland", advised Uddin. "So if you want to feel safe in the next 14 days I suggest you take a holiday there".
Except, suggested a commenter, "Scotland would be one of the first places he would hit with the Faslane nuclear submarine base there".
Uddin was unswayed, and dismissed critics who suggested his plan was likely to trigger retaliatory nuclear attacks, a nuclear winter, and the end of civilisation.
"Not all humankind will be destroyed and the planet will remain intact", the barrister reassured his followers. "But we cannot allow a man with a nuclear weapon to terrorise the world. We are all going to die one day it’s better to die fighting for just cause then to die in the hands of a coward and a terrorist".
"Have you stopped your medication or something?", said a LinkedIn user. Another person said Uddin would "have to change your name to Dr. Strangelove. MAD".
The experts didn't back him, either. "If your solution is to go straight to nuclear, thankfully you aren’t in charge", said Lee Anderson, head of compliance at the UK's Nuclear Decommissioning Authority.
"It is a truly terrible option with no positive outcomes”, said Anderson.