Knights rock

"And now...we conga!" (NB a knight wasn't actually there. That would have been too metal).


A video has appeared on LinkedIn showing staff at Knights enjoying the healing power of song. 

Clips from the listed firm's 2022 conference capture Rock My Business, a team building company, attempting to whip up a singalong. Its work was cut out for it given Knights had recently released a pessimistic trading update which crashed the share price from 365p to 100p.

Set to Queen's 'We Will Rock You', the film begins with shots of staff in lanyards making small talk under a video screen displaying the uplifting edict, "Today is a celebration".


conf2

ARE YOU HAVING FUN YET.


conga

How about now?


Footage shows Brian Allen, the founder of Rock My Business, testing the limits of his microphone with an enthusiastic rendition of Bon Jovi's 'It's my life'. Putting the mic to the audience, the bekilted frontman is repaid with a bellowed, "I ain't gonna live forever!"


conf5

It's not Glasto, but it'll do.


"1,000+ lawyers simply rocked Birmingham ICC to it's core", claimed Allen.

"Freddie Mercury said it best when asked why he was able to engage the crowd the way he did and he replied 'I can only give back what they give me'. I hope we did the same :)", he wrote, which could be read as an ingenious excuse.

At least one employee is still high from the experience. Celebrating two years at Knights, the staff member posted that he had seen "a huge, positive change" during his time at the firm, including "modern culture, pragmatic leadership and, genuinely, brilliant people who I feel privileged to work with and support".

"Awesome. Three years for me next week", responded a partner, adding somewhat ambiguously, "It is truly a different work environment".

Tip Off ROF

Comments

Anonymous 16 September 22 09:47

What have you done to the headstock of that poor Les Paul?  What did it ever do to you?

The Dark Knight 16 September 22 10:06

Now now, ROF, we’ve already discussed this! It has brought back some wonderful memories. 
 

Can’t wait to conga in 2023 😂

Anonymous 16 September 22 10:08

Knights. What happens when David Brent and Xi Jinping father a child together.

Anonymous 16 September 22 11:17

My fave bit was when [redacted] had the cringing hordes exercising whilst marveling at the “steps” being recorded on his Fit Bit.  

After a few minutes of making the cringing masses exercise, [redacted] declared that he preferred his Rolex to his Fit Bit.

This was done without any regard for the fact that employees had been shafted by a 75% share value reduction. [redacted]

The clueless and out of touch buffoons considered the conference to have been a huge success.  No wonder people are leaving in droves. 

 

House of cards 16 September 22 11:22

Alright Dave, bought any sh*t firms lately?

Managed to keep the clients and partners beyond their lock in periods or have they taken the dosh and done one? 

Daisy Chainers 16 September 22 11:44

This looks like daisy chain type naughtiness - that’s how all conferences should end.  All supporting each other - a mass of writhing bodies - the Roman’s were brilliant at it. 
Well done Knights. 

Oh dear oh dear 16 September 22 11:54

Who will be bought next and forced to endure unwanted touching, singing and endless shame?

An announcement will be coming soon……

When you find out that your partners propose to sell you out to this outfit then you need to leave.  You have a bit of time before the June 23 conference.

Good luck. 

 

 

 

Whysoserious? 16 September 22 12:48

Lighten up guys, it was a bit of fun. Knights put on a great day and evening for its staff. Yes this was cheesy as but I think that was the point.

Ritual humiliation 16 September 22 14:23

Was anybody asked to stand at the front at 4 recurring meetings and admit that he was a dickhead because he’d spent years not charging clients enough?  
At least it appears that the ritual humiliation is now being carried out en masse.  

Cheesy and unprofessional 16 September 22 14:28

It looks and sounds like my worst nightmare.  
Hope nobody got their bra strap inadvertently tweaked.  

Question Man 16 September 22 14:38

How many people from the 2021 conference attended the 2022 conference?

How many of those who attended the 2022 conference will still be there by the time of the 2023 conference? 
 

 

Tin pot knight 16 September 22 21:28

Was a great day apart from Fern Cotton explaining how hard it is to be married to the son of a rolling stone and disgustingly wedged. 
 

All law firms have these gatherings and they are all insincere and cringe AF. Hardly news. 
 

Get after the partner conferences and the ‘tours’ of Amsterdam….

How very dare you 17 September 22 09:28

High Street?  We are part of Stoke’s magic circle.  We can charge London rates and all other law firms are going bust.  Dave has told us this many times.

Knight escapee 17 September 22 09:36

Plenty ‘went-on’ behind the scenes in Stoke alone..what happened in Amsterdam???

Anonymous 17 September 22 17:11

Where are they operating now?  They were in the north west market for a while but have disappeared without much trace.

Is it all in the south now? 

Anonymous 19 September 22 09:19

There’s something weird about this shop.  All that false bonhomie makes you wonder about what’s really going on.  

Anonymous 21 September 22 08:29

The owner needs to prop up the share price with some of his 50m.  It’s tanked.  

Anonymous 22 September 22 07:15

No wonder it’s tanked.  Gateley looks to be a far better investment if you’re crazy enough to invest in a law firm. 

Shares in legal and professional services business, Knights Group Holdings PLC (AIM:KGH), slipped 2.4% to 132p hurt by a downgrade by broker Liberum to sell from buy.

Slashing its price target to 100p from 290p the broker said:

“That the number of red flags has increased, and the quality of earnings has continued to deteriorate at Knights, making our previously positive stance on the shares untenable.”

“ Non-underlying costs have grown again despite fewer acquisitions.”

“ Work in progress remains elevated, lock-up days are much higher on our metrics, there are some signs of staff dissatisfaction, and leverage could be higher than it appears.”

“Our analysis suggests the risk profile has materially worsened.”

Anonymous 22 September 22 10:10

Interesting Lawyer article today: 

"Knights is moving but the pawns are quitting

... Shulmans ... had 26 partners at the time of the sale and only four remain ... Departures are natural after a merger, of course, but to lose 85 per cent of an acquired firm’s partners is a fairly clear indication that the ‘ethic’ cited by Jeremy Shulman is not the same as that of Knights. Turnover of associates and other staff members has been high as well ... one only needs to look at the legal gossip blogs to see the listed firm isn’t exactly gaining a great reputation for its culture ... The war for talent is picking up: there is a real shortage of lawyers outside the major legal hubs and Knights’ people are flowing in the wrong direction."

Reply to Anonymous 22 September 10:10 22 September 22 22:51

The Shulmans partners (like the Turner Parkinson partners and various other firms' partners) betrayed their people to enrich themselves, then jumped ship at the first available opportunity. These are not people I would want joining my partnership - they've already shown their true colours. 

The business model 23 September 22 05:23

Buy revenue at a grossly inflated price, rebrand, appoint clueless flunky to preside over the forthcoming mess, increase operating costs by acquiring unnecessarily large expensive office, apply toxic culture, lose all partners/associates worth keeping together with their clients, repeat in a different location. 

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