So farewell then, Professor Sir Guenter Treitel

Author of the Law of Contract.  A humbling intellect.

One of the many stars from the kindertransport.

I bet his will is in order.

He wrote the book so to speak. It was and is an intimidating read for both under and post grads.He must have passed away and a very ripe age.

sounds like he was a nice and impressive man, but I've never liked his books

his written style wasn't very clear and he seemed to find it difficult to distinguish points of law from points of fact. his law of contract makes the law of contract seem much more confusing than it really is.

Not seen Heff thwapping his legal beagle down like this b4

I found Treitel on Contract way too fussy.  Contract is Lego - you can do many things with its many elements, simple or complex, but its principles are simple. Treitel thought it was all sculpture.

Some sort of limerick must be in order.


So goodby Professor Sir Guenter

Heff says you're a bit of a cuenter.

Sir Oliver Popplewell

Knew his estoppel well

A Cheshire and Fifoot type puenter.

Markesinis & Mundy on Torts

were not quite as good as they thought

when faced with a case

of trespass and race

they quickly became overwrought

The works of Professor Paul Craig

On administrative law were quite vague

We were all called to muster

When he set foot from Worcester 

But avoided his lectures like plague.

Just before I went up to read law 

I was told to read Williams before

So I read to page three

said Hmm hmm: not for me

& said fuck off glanville you whore

While reading C Passmore and Thanki

And getting progressively cranky

About Three Rivers (5)

I felt barely alive

So I gave up and went for a wanky.


I was taught land law by "Teddy".

For Professor Burn's oeuvre I was not ready.

He held Christ Church in thrall

With his feoffees and all

But in my case he did in my heady. 


A funny old scholar Prof Goode

 wrote a lot more than he should

on Company law

International MORE MORE

comparitativley never got Wood

For Treitel, full title was vital.

But for Hopkins a trust was enough.

If it's not in the contract or recital

then Guenter would say it was "tough".

But Hoppy would point to the duty,

Quote Wodehouse and light up his pipe.

"Now no-one can dispute its beauty

compared to this contractual tripe".



Those old stalwarts milman and sealey

Were not so compatible really

Milman was sour

with a face oh so dour

Seally was silly and squeally

The duo of Clarkson and Keating

Said criminal law takes some beating 

So I gave it a go

But the bank said "No, no!"

Now I can't afford housing nor heating.

The godfather of Contract is Chitty

The themes he drew out were not bitty

His language was vital

(Unlike Guenter Treitel):

In the Temple he was famed for shouting "titty"

balls, Mutts had already done the Treitel/vital rhyme


Heh x 100 at this thread.

Do you chaps get any work done?

For bills of lading and contracts of affreightment

Scrutton is the most authoritative statement

For bottomry and Brexit

Dick Aikens can shake it

Whilst for scatology best try Carver on Excrement

hmm, my shipping one needs to lose a few words

For bills of lading and contracts of affreightment

Scrutton is the authoritative statement

For bottomry and Brexit

Dick Aikens can shake it

For scatology try Carver on Excrement

Wonderous Markesinis and Deakin

Spent most of their lives creatinin

Marko grew strong

at the expense of schlong

but on peakin deakin still weaklin


on conflict use dicey & morris

heads and shoulders rised above the chorus

Renvoi! said j collier

then boshed more bollinger

and thus puked in a manner decorous 

set one research task I was peeved 

Read tolley and nothing achieved

lightman and moss

were similarly toss

I thought fuck it and then I asked jeeves

For professionals who err and confuse

And whose clients are left quite bemused

There's only one book

That's worth a good look

Jackson & Powell: liability insurers' true muse

A legal author churned out some kids

But her marriage then hit the skids

On her return from Iran

She hatched up a plan

And published her work under "Lyds".  

The youngsters all use lexis nex

which causes the seniors to vex

you've not researched at all

your search ambit too small

de minimis non curat lex!

Spencer Bower on estoppel and waiver:

His prose was concise and to savour.

Alas modern writing

Is rank, not enlightening.

It's technique not mere length that finds favour

On company law, Gower wrote

You should review if doing a float

But corporate twits

only scratch for knits

and tug at their wrinkly scrote



As a corporate lawyer, I'm obliged to point out that that should be "nits".

Construction lawyers need Keating

For building disputes that need treating

It's easy to read

for when one has the need

For giving the bishop a beating

This thread has made an otherwise shite day bearable. Please keep on going.

Richard Calnan is one I've not met

For security law but i bet

I could sit down all nice 

and give him sage advice

But nemo dat non quod habet

Those two fellows, that Hart and that Dworkin

Stayed up all the night loudly talkin'

Try as hard as they might

They couldn't agree whether a law had to be right

So they gave in and ended up porkin'


Robert Goff wrote a lengthy compendium

Restituting whomsoever did come to him.

Engorging his tool

He said, "Come on fool

If you don't change your position, contra proferentem."

There once was a writer called Clarke

Who lacked any sign of a spark.

Then Lindsell said "Why"

"Is your text quite so dry?

Let me sex it all up for a lark." 


Tolleys is the place to go to for tax

Some people it helps to relax

some hearts it gets racing

some minds it gets pacing

and for some it moistens their slacks

That EU directive, what does it mean?

The client's nervous brow glistens with sheen.

Craig & De Burca will know,

Says her solicitor: but, oh no,

That'll all change come this Hallowe'en.

An old chap called stutter once wrote

"i learned all my caselaw by wrote"

when put to the test

in a court, i attest

it looked like he just was a scrote

I suspect strutter might protest he learnt by rote


m'lord, i thinknthe intention is clear enough in the drafting (or would be found so had I used that clause in 2000 contracts at an unnamed MC firm when conteated by VULTURES)

drinking alcohol, I mean, not drinking glue. that would be weird

 not allowed to drink due to meds old sun.  

Mmmm, Grainne.  She was my tutor for criminal law.  I got a desmond in that I think. I was quite distracted.

Goff was not my Godfather, no, Heff.
Sorry, to be clear, when I said "travesty" I meant "pisspoor".

There once was an eminent academic

Who caused an erection of the Buzz dick

His troublesome groin

Went unnoticed by Prof Grainne

As when turgid it was still microscopic


Heffalump has been at the vino sacra



There once was a lawyer called Cross

Who wrote some inordinate dross.

On evidential law

He surely could bore.

And his students did not give a toss. 


Wasn't / isn't Grainne de Burca a constitutional / administrative / EU lecturer? You did well toget a desmond if you answered the criminal paper with references to Factortame etc.

if your query is “what is a partner?”
ignore tolley and chitty and gardiner
but our friend blackett ord
will leave you quite bored
becoming more of a pencil sharpener

This was 1993 Mutts. Don't think she'd gone hardcore EU/constitutional by then. She was asFasF though.

In the 90s Paget was best for banking

But by now he might have lost his ranking.

I don't care if he's out of favour

Cos he gives my shelves a smart arse flavour.

(I'll get my coat ...)

oh dear Wang. Roy wrote on Commercial Law. 

Has it been THAT long?

When choosing ‘twixt Treitel or Chitty

It’s all about law’s nitty gritty.

one is a tome

you could read when at home 

but the other’s remarkably shitty. 

Bought Megarry & Wade in 1981.

£23! It felt like a ton.

Fee simple, commorientes, en ventre sa mere.

If you want some jargon, it's all there.

It's a decent poetic stab though. Better than quite a lot of the shite above.

I once read a book by Megarry

While singing a hymn by H Parry

"And did those feet"

I started to bleat

On freehold mountains green tarry?

Hubert Parry lived in the village next door to me, I discovered recently, and wrote the music to Blake's poem Jerusalem on the organ at Lynchmere Church at the top of the hill above Shulbrede Priory where he lived until his death.  I sing in the choir there.  His ghost is ever present.

if you're going to be overly critical mutts you could at least try to get the last line of your efforts to scan

But TBF Mutters did nail the form with his deep-rooted insight, analysis and comparison on Chitty and Trietel.


Good work! 

Do you remember Professor Atiyah?

Always so happy to see ya

But his talks on contract

So dense and compact

Seemed to last for more than a year