Fuck off to a park

Jog on might have been confusing as to whether you are in support or not 


Do not jog on; proceed to a park at a walking pace

I got terrible blisters from my summer shoes and am now wearing hedgehog socks inside my summer shoes and am furious

Clergs, you aren't one of those fuckers who stares fixedly at their phone whilst walking and then getting all surprised when joggers get crossed when you stray into their path/bump into them, are you?  Because a quick death is to good for you, if so.

No, I am someone who walks in a straight line at a pedestrian pace while joggers expect total command of the pavement.

Joggers r cunts

You remind me of my grandad, Clergs.

When driving past joggers he used to point out of the window with his lit fag and say, "heh heh heh look at those suckers."

Ooo - Miss, Clergham said the Very Bad Word!


I don't expect total command of the pavement.  I just expect dumb cunts to look where they're going.  Obviously too much to ask.

I mean, there has to be something wrong - in societal terms - when we think the answer to people crossing roads looking at their phones is to beam the green man on the road, rather than to let them get run over, improve the genepool, and fine their families for cleaning up the mess, right?

So I'm taking from this that you have deep seated emotional issues and cannot run in a straight line

I have no deep seated emotional issues, other than the fact that I can't run in a straight line due to morons weaving all over the pavement staring at their phones.

Just waiting for Badders to say he can't run in a straight line because he's spectacularly well hung.

Well, obviously.  Veering off to the left due to my enormous appendage is a given.


I'm glad to be leaving London though.  Commuting in a sardine-like environment with disinterested and unobservant idiots starts to give you passive-aggressive space entitlement/encroachment issues after a while.  It grates on my inner yokel.

What Badders said

this is why I only run at 7am on a Saturday morning when no other annoying phone-staring fucker is around to get in my way

the starers with earphones in are the worst

I am not a jogger, but I also get very annoyed with phone starers. But, not being a jogger, I have no qualms about pausing and waiting for them to notice. Either the easy way or the hard way...

Yep, I have been known to just stop, wait for them to bump into me and then tell them to look where they're fucking well going. 


Queenie - yes, that's why I always run up the north Bank first, and only come back on the South Bank.  The phone-staring moron quotient on the South Bank at rush hour is frighteningly high.

even if we did fuck off to the parks as Clergs suggests they're there too



Yes, and the cyclists who hop onto pavements, or swerve into your path.  I had a very strong urge to push one into the canal by Victoria Park the other day when he clipped me trying to swerve round me (at top speed in the pedestrian part of the path) and misjudged the distance.  The cunt.

The thing about joggers is you weave in among people and expect them to anticipate and move or change their pace to suit you

Most people can walk and look at a phone and not bump into anyone

Most people can walk and look at a phone and not bump into anyone

I’m calling bullshit on that one 

what Stix said

put your fucking phones away, people! the world won't end if you don't check your instagram for 10 minutes

I was walking for every post on this thread

zero collisions

zero near collisions

except when a gang of lycratwats zoomed from behind on both sides

jigglebottomed morons

it is possible to do more than one thing at once

For you, yes.  For the world at large, not so much.