Offshore law firm Harneys has taken a novel approach to the ubiquitous COVID-19 advice packs created by firms and made activity books for children.
In an inspired take on how lawyers can assist clients in lockdown, Harneys has produced the puzzles "to help entertain your little ones". The books can be downloaded and printed out, or you can just let the little rascals draw on your screen.
Naturally, the books contain a wealth of subliminal branding.
An insider told RollOnFriday that at least the books were keeping staff busy at the only firm with its own ASS Unit.
"Feel free to forward to friends...especially to friends looking for investment advice."
"I want to work in a tax shelter when I grow up!"
While no more egregious than the equivalent books provided on airlines (R.I.P.), it does feel a little strange to see the next generation being indoctrinated to pick Harneys as their go-to offshore firm.
Other letters of the alphabet are available.
Remember to tell Mummy and Daddy the difference that, unlike the shop on the left, Harneys is always open.
And the difference here is that one house was bought tax free with carefully managed finances.
Rather than a maths question about a bakery or sweet shop, the arithmetic problem is something that kids of ultra high net worth individuals can really relate to:
Next question: calculate how to take the jet to Marbella in lockdown.
A crossword puzzle takes the first steps in showing children that wealth and investment funds can be hidden:
HMRC may also be searching for some of the above.
A traditional pot of gold at the middle of the maze is not sufficient for this audience, so the kids are tasked with locating the private plane:
And the book encourages kids to have a rummage:
Possible answers:
- Something smooth: A tax lawyer whose strategies may or may not land you in trouble with the authorities in five years.
- Something that lights up: Your lawyer's face when instructed.
- Something rough: Your bill.
- Something you can see through: Shameless marketing.
The kids can also colour in the locations of their offshore trusts:
"Fun...Harneys...Fun...Harneys" "Emily, are you alright?" "Yes mummy"
It is not known whether the firm was inspired by this April Fools story a few years ago, or possibly this colouring in book for adult lawyers.
Harneys did not respond to a request for comment either by email or with a crayon.
Comments
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This is surely the work of the ASS Unit!
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V v droll RoF, good job.
Seriously, who advises these people?
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Clearly a design and concept by a no-fee earner whose job is to generate work for themself to remain employed.
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This almost amounts to “grooming”
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Why not create a treasure hunt for tax authorities. We love to pay them to chase Harney's clients around the globe looking for the money they owe in impenetrable nominee and trust accounts in opaque jurisdictions. Such fun!
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They should focus more on paying their staff instead of producing this embarrassing nonsense.
Suitable for a firm that promotes itself through cartoons I suppose.
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On the home scavenger hunt, the truth is everyone likes it rough.
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I'm sure all the children reading the book will grow up and instruct the firm on that basis.
Sadly it was probably created by a middle management type earning more than junior fee earners.
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Or possibly it is community kids fun on a little island, and what's wrong with that. And no I don't work there.
But is that a Virgin plane lost in the middle of the puzzle?
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And people wonder why offshore gets no respect....between the stories at the bottom below and this, what a joke. What a circus.
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That was a great April Fool. The books look spot on.
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Jesus these guys are embarrassing.
Fun fact: internal nickname there is “Self-Harmeys”. Says it all really.
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Apparently they pitch themselves as a “challenger brand”.
I presume they named that strategy after the space shuttle.
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Given their partners' previous approach to reacting to disaster, it could have been a lot worse.
The rebrand looked like it was designed by children, I guess this is just following through on that.
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Maybe this was a cunning ploy by Harneys to generate a new ROF article (how many have there been now?!?) so that memories of the ASS unit might fade:
https://harneys.com/news-and-deals/harneys-establishes-asia-special-situations-unit/
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I'm not sure why this is generating so much hate. Compared to the usual absolute drivel law firms pump out as "marketing" (ooh! my sixteenth law firm bulletin on Covid-19 this week!) this looks sweet and quite a nice idea.
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Offshore is where you go when you have failed in your home jurisdiction. It is therefore unsurprising that offshore firms are full of second rate people with dysfunctional ideas.
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@Harsh but fair we look forward to welcoming you when you fail in your home jurisdiction, which surely you will with such a horrible attitude!
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I thought offshore firms are where people go to make cash and avoid tax. As well as mainly doing pre-lit deals where both lawyers know each other and the clients are too unaware of the law in the jurisdiction to question the deal.
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Firms do the oddest things. Hogan Lovells' response to a crisis over stress at work was to give lawyers mindfulness booklets and colouring-in sheets...which really, really suggested that lessons had not been learned.
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Offshore law firms are for failures. Who wakes up and says: “I am on the partnership track/in with a chance of Silk soon. I know: I’ll pack it in and become a post box for onshore lawyers!”?
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You can say what you like, but on this instance I genuinely see no ill with this!
Did someone at ROF have a nasty experience with Harneys? Seems an awful lot of focus, for such an irrelevant firm...
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Lots of keyboard warriors I see...
Settle down before someone’s feelings actually get hurt!