_{Just another day in court.}  

The Law Society has released a scathing report detailing the "shambolic state" of court buildings across England and Wales, and saying there is an urgent need for government investment.

Sounding like a horror attraction built for Halloween, the report found cruddy courts suffering from "asbestos, mould, inadequate air conditioning, dilapidated toilets "and "cells regularly flooding with excrement." 

One solicitor in South Shields reported that the court was forced to close for two days due to "dead and rotting seagulls" in the roof, resulting in maggots "literally raining down onto the lobby", which tops even Gowling WLG's pigeon death trap. 

Also, likely to score no stars on TripAdvisor, Manchester Crown Court encountered a rat infestation, reported another solicitor, and its buildings are "literally crumbling". (It wouldn't be the first court to deteriorate). Cells have become so overwhelmed that vans queue up outside with suspects having to urinate in bags.

The report also revealed that Hull Crown Court had a sewage pipe leak in a robing room which sprayed "personal items, carpets and desks" and led to "a significant health risk" with "several counsel and solicitors" becoming "very ill". Apologies to readers tucking into their mango sunshine bowl from Pret, this morning.

When asked whether the court infrastructure is fit for purpose, almost two-thirds of the respondent solicitors said they had encountered delays in their cases being heard over the last year, due to the state of the courts. 

The Law Society stated that the delays have resulted in clients and victims being "left in limbo and denied access to justice with many at risk of losing jobs, facing insecure housing situations and wasting both time and money". 

Online hearings aren't great either, as a fifth of respondents said the technology in the courts was "not at all" fit for purpose, due to poor quality remote hearings, software problems and a lack of working plug sockets at court.

Law Society president Richard Atkinson said the poor state of the courts is "both a contributor to the huge backlog of court cases and an illustration of the woeful lack of investment in our justice system. Government underfunding is denying us, our children and our businesses a vital public service”.

Atkinson also complained that the backlog in the Crown Courts "stands at more than 76,957 cases, while two-thirds of care cases in family courts take longer than the 26-week time limit."

“Behind each of these statistics are tens of thousands of adults and children who could be freed from limbo and move forward with their lives if they could have their day in court," Atkinson said.

Attempting to stem the tide, Lord Chancellor David Lammy announced this week that an additional 1,250 sitting days will be allocated to the Crown court this financial year. 

A Ministry of Justice spokesperson said the government "is working flat out to ensure our courts and tribunals are safe, secure and equipped with the latest technology."  

“We have already boosted capital funding to £148.5m and carried out around one million maintenance visits this year to make our buildings become fit for everyone who uses them,” the spokesperson added.