The Supreme Court of Queensland was subjected to an expletive filled rant from a disgruntled defendant last week, who used the word "f*ck" 77 times during a hearing.

The defendant did little to endear himself to the judge during the short hearing. Effing and blinding from the outset, he opened by telling the judge: "look - listen here, mate, you don't know what you're f*cking  talking about". He added that the judge was a "lard arse", telling him to "stick your trial up your f*cking arse" and, enigmatically, complaining that the judge was "talking but not in the lingo language". And when the judge made an order he responded, with rapier wit, "Order me a f*ckin' pizza while you're at it". Boom.

Courtroom scenes in Brisbane

The judge remained remarkably patient, threatening to have the defendant manacled only towards the end of the hearing. Those not offended by fruity language can click here to read the transcript in all its glory.