Those little trophies "deal maker" lawyers get when their deals complete

Is this still a thing?

"project awesome 14 August 2022"

?

I've had about 3 in the past 10 years - only for the BIIIIIG deals.  They're really expensive tho (basic ones are about £200 each).  Recall we all got them at a completion dinner in some hotel and left them in the bar (about 10 of them) and never recovered them.

Binned them all a few years ago, but I have one in the cellar.  It's a very naaaice one.  So I display it. In a box.  In the cellar.

Tombstones used to be a thing. I have seen people ambitiously try to flog them on eBay…

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/275403614054?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-127632-2357-0&ssspo=rlENTwFxTZu&sssrc=2349624&ssuid=46z3WR_3Sp6&var=&widget_ver=artemis&media=COPY

This must be pure speculation on the off chance that someone somewhere might collect them. However, if collecting these is a thing then I have literally a shed load of the little buggers.

They're an utterly absurd waste of space and money.  Yes, in a few years time I'd really like to look up to the shelf and be reminded of the pain from beginning to end working for Ladyparts R Us PLC on their acquisition of Bellcheddars, Inc

I saw some "eco" ones made out of wood rather than plastic recently.  Looked like remedial year 5 woodwork, or maybe one of those welly remover things.  

At the tech firm I used to work a colleague tombstoned a £50 note and gave it to another colleague to settle a £50 bet.

One of the junior bankers ordered one for his first deal he did himself.  It was financing some CT machines for a private hospital in Germany or Austria.  €6m.  It looked so sad next to the USD$9,000,000,000 etc stuff.  He got a lot of abuse for that.

A colleague completed a deal to build a hospital and received a glass block with a likeness of the building created with tiny bubbles in it (a “bubblegram” appaz) as a memento.

Ugliest object in Christendom

I got two ever I think.  One was for a massive restructuring.  Worldwide oil n gas shyz.  The finance advisers sent me the prototype.  TO my eternal shame, I pointed out that the world map on which the oil platform miniature sat had been printed back to front.  I wish I had kept shtum, not one single other bugger noticed.

Only w**kers keep them. It’s astonishing that people ever displayed them. 
 

See that bookshelf? I amended all those SPAs myself. 

Billing for blinking shows distinct lack of imagination. 

 

Left eye wink - 6mins 

Right eye wink - 6mins 

Not being a creep training - 60mins CSR. 

Apparently people who did financing for planes and ships used to get little model planes and boats.  Wonder if they played with them when no-one was looking. 

I once saw one that looked like a glass dildo. It didn’t have any details of the deal on it though. 

“I once saw one that looked like a glass dildo. It didn’t have any details of the deal on it though.”

Heh. Who says the industray is not making great strides in gender relations! …Good to see the ladies leaning in etc:

The only circumstance in which they might not be a complete waste of time is if in a few years' time the deal you're working on becomes infamous.

"Herbert D. Flenderson III advised RJR Nabisco on their sale to KKR", etc.

not really much of a thing any more I’m afraid, with the exception of asset financing where a scale model of the asset - eg ship, aircraft, train - is acceptable

Rather glad that the mementos of my major matters are published in various law reports and not sitting on my desk. 

Apparently people who did financing for planes and ships used to get little model planes and boats.  Wonder if they played with them when no-one was looking. 

Of course! 

Displaying lucites/deal toys for the desk was pretty normal 20 years ago.  I thought less of any lawyer who did it in a law firm office tho.

No, it was just a standard part of the costs of the deal for a very long time.  The cost was normally paid upfront by the lad bank (ideally from a provision on deal costs from the P&L) and then recouped from everyone.

heh at this thread - very 1990's

Not had one since 2011 and have only kept the ones with particular "quirks and features":

- my first scheme of arrangement for a once well known booze brand 

- for an IPO of a now defunct IT company - just to remind me what a complete and utter hopeless [email protected] the partner I used to work with was

- for an infamous IPO of company whose entire board was subsequently jailed 

I have one.  It was a gift from a mate, after I complained I'd never got one.  It looks cool.  It's for some hideous NordLB synthetic CMBS that probably brought down half a dozen Norwegian pension funds 12 months later.

To my knowledge, two of my deals have led to tombstones, both long agk.  I was integral to both deals - one as the clueless (but only) grunt, the other actually getting shit done.

It was only when visiting the client's office (once for the closing lunch - at least they had one, once on secondment) that I saw them.

Yeah thanks guys.

 

 

 

 

 

Cheradenine

I fear we may have been on some of the same deals. Especially if the Scheme had a French dimension.

Cracking name.  Sophisticated.  One could even say Cultured.

I got one for some work I did on a chain of boutique hotels, if you can have such a thing. 

It was a Mini wine cask (empty). 

You can probably guess the deal. 

Anyway, I gave it to the partner because he didn't get one. He gave me a bottle of champagne. We were both happy. 

The worst thing is when your team gets some bullshit award, and even though you claim you don't care, a colleague souvenirs it. 

I hate that.

Was asked to bring a nice doll-sized wool jumper back to office for display by a cünt of a notboss that I gave to my young daughter at the time.

I got her to try and wear it first then sellotaped it back into its display cabinet.

he was a small, round man.

 

Closing dinners absolutely should stet. They were great.

On deals that go on for a very long time - restructurings, project financings - it used to be reasonably common for the deal memento to be a caricature of all the advisor and principal individuals set in some kind of diarama (so?) vaguely relating to the deal eg an airline restructuring might have some of the characters buzzing around piloting planes while others barked orders from the control tower or wotnot. If executed well, these could actually be a lot more charming and funny than I’ve made them sound, A witty record of the collective endeavours of a bunch of souls who’d been thrown together by circumstance and come to know one another well.

I think it is ok to celebrate things at work tbh. Just acetate tombstones are naff.

Fair Q, although since returning to London I’ve found face to face meetings not quite as dead as I expected 

These are awful things 

Pay people well 

Have completion drinks 

Respect their down time 

A little trophy is utterly weird. Like winning 'most improved' at your under 10s football club.

 

I have gold and platinum discs and some truly mortifying liner note credits plus good film credits. THey are also cellar fillers.

But heh at cheradenine and his jailed board