Techniques for managing anxiety

Do you have any? If so, what are they and do they work? 

I'm not really an anxious person by nature but there is one thing causing it at the moment and it's not something I can control, so I need to find a coping mechanism. 

Thanks all. 

exercise

rigorously limiting the time I spend on any one activity

build in family time at start and end of day

at least one evening per week, smash strong craft beers until I can barely speak

I used to drink heavily.

Now I just remember how drinking heavily didn't work and try to focus on the good stuff.  Which for almost everyone on this board is plentiful.

It was more a reference to not allowing work to spill over into chill time and family time, Rhammers, and to avoiding workaholism. It probably does suit my ADHD tho.

If you really dont think you are not an anxious person but there is one thing causing it you are in a great position as you have defined the cause and it is specific. This would then start to sound more like a fear, so could be a case of confronting it to reduce anxiety

 

I didnt think I was anxious until my early 30s when I realised there were a few things that seemed to cause a generalised anxiety - since then the list has grown... 

 

Things that work for me...

 

  1. Escaping the normal space and talking about it  - this is as simple as going to the pub and having a chat as it allows you to look back on the issue from a distance
  2. Fear setting - going through the worst case scenario and considering how you would deal with it
  3. Remembering this life thing is just a game and the more you treat it as one the more successful you will be
  4. Reading/listening to fiction
  5. Self Help books

 

Mostly my approach consists of trying to take a further step back from the situation and view it objectively. So much easier said than done and I find I can be dragged back into the moment in a split second but it is an ongoing effort

tbf I wouldn't recommend drinking heavily except as a short term measure ...

depends a bit on the source though. if it's a work thing then meditation and what pinkers said plus exercise your dontgivvafvck muscle - no one dies if you mess up so at work so do the best you can and then go home. look for a new job. or just quit. 

if it's a personal/family/health thing that you have to come to terms with then definitely meditation

 

Yeah I’d skip the drinking for a while it just makes things worse.

Exercise.

Taking a lunchtime walk around the block and finding somewhere peaceful to just admire the view for 20 minutes.

Making sure you are getting the right amount of sleep.   So regular bedtimes and a set routine before bed.

Less red meat.

Meditation.

If things continue don’t be afraid about seeing a doctor - could be worth a few CBT sessions to help with coping strategies if you can get a referral.  Drugs don’t always work and can take up to three months to kick in so not the best solution for you.

Establishing what is triggering it and doing some breathing exercises before engaging in that activity.

Positive reinforcements using visualisation.

Reminding yourself how lucky you are to have someone sharing your life, maybe try talking to him about it, sometimes it can help to just “talk it out”.

Goodluck.

Thanks all.

People keep telling me to try meditation so I should probably look into it. 

Does anyone do yoga? My exercise routine is usually just to run until I am knackered, so I probably need to mix things up a bit.

I don't like mediation and it doesn't help everyone 

I suggest:
rigorous boundary setting so whatever it is does not consume you and reading Thrive by Dr Rob Kelly. 

I also do meditation (it seemingly being soooo rof at the moment) but I now think that actually anything where you are just focused on the thing in hand count, so exercise (maybe do something different if what you currently do is a bit boring) or something like fishing or a long walk in the country, or even just taking time to go for a nice meal and a film with Mr Anna (the latter was completely random* and one of my best days of 2019 so far**)

 

*with Mrs G not Mr Anna ftaod

**2019 has been fvcking shit so far tbf so it has not got a lot of competition tbh

If it's one specific thing that's causing the anxiety then I find talking to other people and doing some research to see if there are other ways of dealing with it.

I spent most of the last two years with one specific thing causing the majority of my stress and anxiety with little control over some of the stress causing aspects but talking to the other involved in the situation and working out ways to deal with some of the issues certainly helped.  Trying to get away from it all occasionally also helped although it's hard to really get away from something that takes up most of your waking hours.

Sports

Computer games

Reading

The neverending lash

I do/have done yoga although now don't as I changed gyms and all the yummy mummies book the classes before I get a chance. I think yoga is great for this (especially the stuff with lots of balance and strength poses too)

Dude, I think you need to be kinder to yourself. Don't feel bad for feeling anxious. It's totally normal and anyone else would feel exactly the same. Mindfulness might help you sit with your anxiety in a less anxious way if that makes any sense? Accept it almost? I know you're doing everything else you can to improve the situation, but if you can reduce the stress this is putting on you, it'll keep your cortisol levels down and be better for your overall health.

I have some friends who swear by yoga for calming them down so I'd give that a shot.

Reading or binge watching a good TV series is also a good way to take your mind off things. I also find making a playlist of only positive songs can help. 

All of these suggestions to take up new things but before doing anything new, make sure you scale back. 

 

Drop 40% of your current life and simplify. 

 

My wife had a 3 months (hugely out of character) bout of anxiety a couple of years ago. We spent a week tracking her day like a law firm time sheet, even in increments of 6 mins, saw how much time wasn't conducive to happiness and / or wasted and replaced a lot of it with the good stuff mentioned above. 

Worked a treat. 

 

If recommend bouldering for a great sport to take up that occupies the mind 

 

Also if you can get your OH and friend to buy in to this new life, so meet ups revolve around the new activities you're gonna take up to cement them in your life. 

 

That really helped Mrs B. 

 

And have all the sex 

I will be stressed unless I've worked out a plan to work through it and  contingency plan and managed that the best I can.  None of the other techniques distract me enough... but I was an EPIC worrier.

 

Do you have any? If so, what are they and do they work? 

I'm not really an anxious person by nature but there is one thing causing it at the moment and it's not something I can control, so I need to find a coping mechanism."

Oh but you can control it. You could accept that Remain lost the referendum.

Running and mixing up exercise, especially some kind of team exercise (BMF is great)

If you are British a drink in the pub with a close friend and talk about it. If you are forrin I can't help. 

Element of stiff upper lip to be honest I have found helps.

Sleep sleep sleep. Come home from work, eat and go straight to bed (no TV, faffing on phone etc).

Change career (I have done other things other than law, but as Michael Corleone said in The Godfather Part III, "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in".).

Drink.

Take up a martial art (I once did and stopped, to my regret)

Drink

Take up a musical instrument (as above)

Drink

Do something creative (I still do)

Drink

Iamlong. 'Forrin'? Oh dear. One doesn't have to go to a pub. A bar, maybe. or a pub and drink European blonde beers (which are better than the brown, warm. weak, English beers). Sadly, British pub wine is awful and doesn't complement the surprisingly improving standard of food.

Having a drink with a good friend is one way of dealing with it, but only one can de-stress by doing one's own thing. Others and myself have made a list and you, Lady P will surely have your own solutions.

Another suggestion. If not change career, change jobs within the law. 9 to 5, frankly, is better than an environment of targeted billable hours.

'Decide what kind of life you actually want, then say no to everything that isn't that. This mindset worked for me; plus: Louise Hay's meditations, water aerobics, pilates and yoga in rotation. 

It helped me to eliminate what was causing me my anxiety (work/certain people at work) and subsequently have the strength to leave to do what I really wanted to do.