So fucking ill

Sunday evening 10 days ago felt a bit wretched.

Mon/Tue/We/Thur/Fri/Sat/Sun/Mon/Tue still major stomach aches. Mon Tue Wed puking but no food so just retching froth.  Dr says stomach ulcer. soothing with some sort of stomach lining velvet liquid and antibiotic to kill the helicobacter.

Then Sunday last weekend after 8 days of misery, a sore throat. FFS. Two days of coughing and sweating on top of everything else.

Now old neuralgia from previous shingles on nerve on shoulder up to nape of neck hurting. Headache. Throat ache. Stomach ache. Back ache. Neck ache. Eyes puffy and baggy. Eye lids feel like granite.

If I was a horse it would be glue factory time.

I assume my cock will drop off soon and then I will get lymphoma of the everything and decline slowly, begin to shrivel up and just get blown away like ashes in the wind.

 

On the upside I've lost a lot of weight in 10 days, though no alcohol and not much food (even when I am hungry my stomach hurts like fuck as soon as I start eating as the stomach acid irritates the lining so I lose my appetite after a mouthful).

 

You knew that bathhouse lifestyle out on the west coast in the 80s would catch up with you one day

I even tried a glass full of kefir the other day. I mean, how bad have things got that my mind now thinks it is ok to drink gone off yoghurt drink?

FFs dont take any ibuprofen, that'll proper fck u.  have attempted a text

What else could it be?

Time to embrace Jesus as your lord and saviour and beg for forgiveness of your past sins.

I don't think the Baybee Cheezers can sort this. There are too many angles even for his omipotentness.

Also, there's past sins and then there's past sins.

That may take some time if he has to list them.  Chin up mutters, you’ll get through this.  Gentle soups?  I always find quite salty crackers and cupasoups are a godsend when I’m sickly as you describe.

Get well soon.

Thanks. I force fed myself a sausage today. Let's see what happens.

Mutts, how old are you? Seems to me it's time to make a choice. Continue as you did and keep having these outbursts of bad health and then keel over at 65 or change tack and decide you want to live longer and with better quality of life.

Salad is good. Baby toms, watercress, spinach, some cheese. You can just pick on whatever you want, leave it for half an hour then come back to it. My usual lunch.

Tomatoes are highly acidic, not what he needs right now.

I would go for heinz chicken soup (with w sauce in) and laughing cow spread on baguette to dip

Not sure quite where the "keep having outbursts of bad health" issue comes from as in fact I have had precisely 2 sick days from work since 1995 but I did have a hip injury a year ago that made me feel veh old and decrepit (but I was working) and I also had a little bit of a woahfuck moment in relation to suspected bladder tumour earlier in life but it turned out not to be. To be fair, my health has been ok.

I take your point though, Trix, and am always mindful of this balance in all I do. I stopped travelling this year so much for precisely that reason.

I am at a crossroads decisionwise. I can't be specific here but am about to make a decision impacting the next 3 years which I think will be my big finish. I will then retire from this level of activity at 55.

Chambo, most of that sounds entirely the wrong thing to dangle into a peptic furnace.

Worcester Sauce? Why not just drink a pint of Tabasco and stab myself in the duodenum with a hot poker then rub basaltic magma over my smoking corpse?

Tbf i usually add tabasco and pepper too.

Wsauce baint spicy, it's roman fishgut sauce

Worcester sauce is RONG.

Henderson’s relish is what you are after. 100% fish free and 100% delicious.

Poor, poor Mutts. It sounds absolutely awful - clearly the baddest of bad Aids. I have nothing to suggest other than cuddling up with a snuggly blanket and the dog.

Hope you feel better soonest.

yes I do, Klaus. But that is not me.

 

What he's up to there is that a swarm (now is the season) has decided to alight on that post or table so he's set up a mobile hive box and he's managed to locate the queen and she's inside, so everyone else is going inside too.

I find those "fencing" style hoods no good, as the mesh can push against your face and y ou can get stung too easily through the mesh. a hat veil is better. I do have 2 of those suits though.

Lok at how unbothered everyone is. that is because swarms are very peaceful and will not sting. In 30 mins every bee that is on the wing in that pic will be inside the box.

Not too much competition really as generally getting a swarm in at this time of the year is a lot of work for nothing in return until well into next year.  Usually it is a favour to take one in July/ Aug and there may be an upside to the bee keeper in doing so but before that comes you have to

1. Get it. That involves driving and taking the swarm and boxing it up and taking it home without it all leaking out into the car (exciting)

2. have a spare hive ready (if you have to build one up it's expensive and time consuming - a lot of flat pack for the hive parts but then a LOT of frame making with wax foundation etc)

3. feed them while they develop a brood

4. Manage disease and parasytes

5. check the new queen is laying (a swarm is only a swarm as a new queen has emerged from a cell and left the hive and workers and drones have followed her and split from the other colony)

5. Help the brood grow fast so they are fit for winter then get them through winter when they have no honey reserves (so feed them and keep them clear of attack - mice eat wax and wasps eat grubs)

All this assumes they don't swarm again or kill their queen or are too small a nuc to survive winter etc .

it is good when you get a free colony. I got 2 this year.

You must have felt like Lloyd George after the Treaty of Versailles 

If you were that ill you wouldn’t be roffing, you massive hypochondriac.

A free colony would be unlikely to take your mind off your various alimentary travails