Sam Cooper - 14 year old killed himself because of online bullying

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7258981/Devastated-pupils-screamed-saw-saw-seeing-Sam-Connor-14-killed-train.html

Horrible, just horrible. Couldn't schools have some sort of safeguards against online bullying, I don't know how they would implement or monitor it but this just left me feeling so sad. I guess its much harder growing up; with online bullying you cannot just ignore it, stay inside / not go outside during lunchtime / playtime.

 

Devastated pupils screamed 'I saw it, I saw it' and wept after seeing 'online bullying victim' Sam Connor killed by a train - as relatives pay tribute to the 'funny' and 'bright' schoolboy.

The tragic 14-year-old was struck by the train in front of 50 of his horrified classmates, who they described as 'a nice young kid with a good sense of humour.'

Heartbroken relatives said bullies were posting unkind things about him online, as reported by The Sun.

Sobbing pupils called out 'I saw it, I saw it' and shouted Sam's name shortly after he was hit by the train at Chertsey station, in Surrey.

Agreed that this is tragic. Bullying has to be the worst thing about being a child 

Maybe it's a generational thing that I just don't get, not having grown up in the age of social media, but if I knew my kid was being bullied on-line (and the article seems to indicate that the family knew, although on a quick read it wasn't clar whether the bullying was on line, but let's assume that it was), I would just remove all access to social media, take away the smartphone, etc.

Because doing so would leave them incredibly socially isolated. And you turn your child into a social outcast in addition to dealing with the effects of the bullying, so they are doubly stressed 

From what I've read it wasn't necessarily online but wasn't physical.  Apparently he had a good group of friends but had had trouble with other groups which makes it particularly sad.

Technology is supposed to be advancing.

The reality is that it brings out the worst in human nature.

Thank Christ we didn't have smartphones at school.

To be fair my tormentors at school didn't need technology as they slept in the same room as me so were able to keep things up 24 hours a day seven days a week.  The only saving grace was being able to totally avoid them during the holidays.

I think that is the real issue - with social media there is no escape from it, not at home, not in the holidays, never. 

 

 

Actually one of my worst tormentors also lived near me at home so I'd be forced to see him in the holidays as well.  My parent now admit that if they'd know how much of a khunt he was they wouldn't have me to the same schools as him for 14 years.

"with social media there is no escape from it, not at home, not in the holidays, never."

 

But that's what I don't get. Why not? Just don't go on line. I know one can object "Why should the victim have to hide?" etc. which is a valid point but not one that addresses the supposed inescapability of on-line bullying.

My brother is a teacher and he says that it is hard enough to control physical or verbal bullying never mind online which is nearly impossible for them to police.

PP - linda answered that above. 

These days teens whole lives are on their phones. 

Also, even if you are not on line they are still posting shit to each other about the victim... it is there. If you try to ignore it your m8s will be sure to point it out to you... 

The fat is that, in the old days, you could escape at home, and the weekends and the holidays in most cases. 

PP I suppose part of it is just get them to lock down their profiles and only allow access to actual friends. Strangely enough that is how I do it on both FB and IG but for different reasons. Just block the undesirables.

My son goes to secondary school in two years. This sort of thing gives me nightmares. Poor lad. 

PP I suppose part of it is just get them to lock down their profiles and only allow access to actual friends. Strangely enough that is how I do it on both FB and IG but for different reasons. Just block the undesirables.

You can lock down your own profile but you can't stop other people posting shit about you on their totally open profiles. And sure, you can just "not look" or even block them, but if all the things you can do to keep them at bay are things you do unilaterally, you have to have the strength to not look and to keep those people blocked. A lot of the time kids are going to torture themselves by looking to see what shit people are saying about them.

I've already decided that if anyone bullies my child I'm going to pay someone to burn their house down

LP I get that, and it won't solve anything but it is still a measure you can take.

God, I love being over 30.

I would hate to be a kid again, especially now.

Kids are total cunts to each other it is a nightmare. 

What Hoolie said. I’m so grateful I was never bullied, but I doubt anyone gets away with that nowadays 

I was horribly bullied at one school. That was hard enough to deal with but it was fixed by moving schools. Imagine if those horrid little shits could have still sent me messages.... I could just walk away and start fresh. 

Same here, Wibble. I left at the end of a half term when I was 12 and didn't see any of the khunts again until many years later in the pub. (And by then I didn't give a shit.)

Wibble, same here, bullied at school, then moved school. Was still in the local area, but a better environment and enabled me to reinvent myself a bit. Also got really good at rugby and somewhat physically bigger and tougher at that point so when I did see the local khunts they were less willing to try it after the first one got put on his arse.

I'm with Wellington. Go full Scott Tennerman Must Die.

It is quite amazing how quickly a well placed fist across the bridge of the nose will end bullying

It's not just social media but in this day and age easy for your classmates to pass your number round so that they can take it in turns to send abusive texts and when you block one another one takes over and then they can buy cheap pay as you go phones to keep it up.

To be fair some of the people who were khunts to me have have had trouble with their consciences in later life and have apologised.

In case people hadn't noticed, it happens on here sometimes as well. Amongst supposedly well educated professional adults.

Anonymity. Say whatever shite you like that you would never dare say in real life.

Kids.

“It is quite amazing how quickly a well placed fist across the bridge of the nose will end bullying”

Yes yes but if you start throwing fists around in response to massive online goading and bullying *you* are the one who ends up in deep shit 

Because under direction of their helicopter mothers the little darlings delete everything and the try to make out their victim is a violent psycho. 

This sort of shit is really not helpful or useful advice to anyone Supes: 

 

"It is quite amazing how quickly a well placed fist across the bridge of the nose will end bullying"

1. it makes the victim blame themselves for being too scared to "stand up to them". 

2. When I did what you suggest, three of them beat the living crap out of me with hockey sticks to teach me a lesson. 

 

HTH

 

 

Fine with me. No one would dare bully a violent psycho ever again.

I'm lucky to not have been bullied. Maybe I was SO WEIRD that I was perceived as too much of an outsider to be part of the system of cruel social Darwinism that is the American high school.

When I did what I suggest no one ever bullied me again. 

The sheer amount of blood alone kept most people from even thinking about having a go.

An expelled violent psycho. It’s not helpful or good advice 

Supes that approach really doesn't work if you're only 4' 8" aged 13 as I was.  However, a well placed knee in one bloke's nuts did slow him down for a day or two and result in the trauma of having his nuts fondled by the school doctor who was rumoured to be a paedophile.

I agree that a smack to the face doesn't help. When I put someone down it was more they hit me then I pinned them on the ground until they realized that they did not have the position of strength.

I just found learning to laugh it off and turn it back on them far more effective and most of them quit once they realised they were never going to grind me down.

Nobody ever bullied me as a kid. Too big and all that.

When we went to Cayman for a few years my son got bullied by the local fat kids, for being white basically.

What happened subsequently was that I got called into the headmaster's office because there had been a fight and my son James had put one of them in hospital. A well known bully kid and the son of a senior government minister.

Yes, difficult.

I never had to buy a drink in the expat bars there again.

Actually no mention of a large dog or rugby so only a 6/10

I was sort of picked on but not really bullied.  It wasn’t a physical thing, purely psychological because my family was poor.  Very difficult to figure out how to deal with it, I couldn’t escalate it to physical because then I’d be the one kicked out and I couldn’t really respond to jibes about my dad’s car or whatever, so I just ignored it as best I could.

Definitely had an impact on me though and I’d imagine with social media as it is it must be a hundred times worse.

Poor kid, I hope the bullies feel thoroughly ashamed of themselves and guilty as hell.

I suspect that as teenagers they'll persuade themselves it was someone else's fault and will only really come to appreciate the role they played in about 20 years.

The little b*$%@#ds should be horsewhipped. That 'll learn them.

Apologies for overreaction but bullying really gets to me.

In fact as I've got older I've become increasingly intolerant of nasty behaviour. Life throws enough shit at you without having to cope with other people having a pop as well. Why the feck can't people just be nice (unless of course the other person is one of my shitty relations in which case they deserve both barrels).

Why the feck can't people just be nice?

Because people are cretins and the human race is ultimately doomed due to its own stupidity 

(as I've got older I've got more misanthropic) 

Supes' hilarious tough guy act on this thread comes across as classic school bully.