Northern people
Wang's Upon a Time 13 Aug 19 08:41
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Things to do around whitby pls.  Have been several times b4 - fancy venturing further afield so walks/boat trips tips etc welcomed.  Anyone done the whale watching?

how many times have u done the dracula experience? do one more

The mrs' gr7 aunt was warden at the church and used to go beserk wgen yank tpurists asked her where dracula's grave was.

We have tix for the ghost walk.

Lol, Dracula. Literally the most boring book about vampires ever written.

yeah that's ridiculous ofc he couldn't be buried on hallowed ground!

I think it was a good insight into what passed for excitement in the 1800s

Fishing trips are good, on a proper fishing boat with a local captain. Robin Hoods bay is nice.

Or you could sit on the cliffs and help Merckz tag sea birds.

'Oh you beastly Dracy! You noughtn't bite me noughtn't you? I am aflush and aflutter with fear!'

'mwahahaha, I shall transform myself into a cool mist and slink away'

'Oh you absolute scoundrel Dracy' *Blushes.

Take a trip with the missus to the Raby Hunt, not too far away and the food is impossibly good.

My sketchy mental spreadsheet reminds me that Wang's missus is actually from that area.

I only read Dracula this year. I thought it was good. 


Staithes is v pretty

Flamborough head for the burds

Steam train in Goathland/Grosmont and a pint with Greengrass in the Aidensfield Arms

I should advise avoiding the Dark Side of the Country, and visiting the Lakes or other wonders of the Glorious county of Lancashire 

Good advice generally judo but think your geography needs work. 

TBF, I only did two years of Geoggers and was never much good at it. My abiding memory was a field trip to see “urban deprivation” which comprised a bunch of private school girls on a coach (which we couldn’t get out of) touring Moss Side and Hulme. 

Heh we were probably less than a hundred yards apart that day judo

What mr H said. I think staithes is where Bernie Cribbins plays captain Birdseye in that kids tv show

Zero G was it you behind the bushes in moss side park with the raincoat and binocs watching the posh girls?

I haven’t done the whale watching but know people who have and it is meant to be good 

I assume you’ve done the NY Moors Steam Railway?

Goathland is good for walks.

Flamborough Head, but most of the seabirds -  except Gannets - have left


Tbf in “moss side park” the pervs don’t stand on pleasantries like hiding behind bushes when they knock one off

we were warned virtually every day about “the undesirables in the bushes”. 

Old Jacks Boat. Never been myself but have it pencilled in for a visit. 

Hutton le hole is lovely too

I am northern. I recommend going to see Anthony Gormley's iron men.

Aren't Anthony Gormley's Iron Men in Liverpool?

ZG if you thought Dracula was a good book about vampires then I can only assume the number of books about vampires that you have read is exactly one.

That's pretty shocking JC.  They took you to stare at people in Moss Side like fucking safari animals?

Judy did Zero G "gun" you in moss side park? Show on the dolly.

Yes. But you asked for recommendations from northern people and I've never been anywhere near Whitby.

Yeah I've not been to Whitby either.

Suggest you have a morning in Whitby, pop over to see Gormley's iron men for lunch, quick tour of Moss Side in the afternoon, dinner in Windermere and then pop to the Toon for a few bevvies in the evening.  

Mugen I thought it was a good book (with specifically the vampire qualification). 

Now it comes to it I’m actually struggling to think about what other books about vampires I’ve read. I can think of a couple of Stephen King short stories and a few discworld books and that’s it. 

I never read Salem’s Lot. 

What am I missing out on?

There is that one about an ancient vamp who collects books - the book collector or the historian?

The interview with the vampire ones are turbotoss

I actually have that one but have never read it. Is it any good? I’d say it’s been on my shelf for at least five years. 

Worth a read.  I may have spolied it by telling u he is a vampire.



Dracula was bad.  The sequel (written by Care Stoker) was execrable. 


Things to do in the north:


1.  Chav fishing.  Put a fiver on the end of your fishing line and reel it in fast down Stockton High Street.  If you start outside KFC or the Highland Laddie you should be able to land a whopper.


2.  Bar fly.   Sellotape a packet of pork scratchings to the inside of the Wetherspoons window in Durham and watch pissheads bounce off the glass trying to get to them.


3.  NIMBY baiting.  Head to Trattoria Cena in Yarm.  Put up a poster announcing the opening of a Poundstretcher on the high street, and hear the tut rate go faster than Lars Ulrich's click track.


4.  Human Hungry Hippos.  Go to the central Overeaters Anonymous in Middlesboro, lob in a handful of Maltesers and watch the scrabbling ensure.  Take a couple of mates and pick your hippo to see if they win the most chocolate.

There are loads of great pubs, so I suggest pretending to become accidentally separated from your family.

Lol, Dracula. Literally the most boring book about vampires ever written.

You haven't read the Twilight series then, I take it?

My abiding memory was a field trip to see “urban deprivation” which comprised a bunch of private school girls on a coach (which we couldn’t get out of) touring Moss Side and Hulme. 

Lol wut

Imagine if you’d got out! A bunch of posh girls with sudden access to tough looking boys from the wrong side of the tracks, glowering under their hoodies? They’d never have got you back on the bus.

"Now watch out girls they're rough undesirables"


Where did the Lancashire bollocks creep in here. You could go to Scarborough with a few rolls of coins and play the slot machines on the seafront. A bit surreal for a London lawyer probably.

Good fish and chips though.

I am from West Yorkshire so know that bit of the coastline pretty well.

Go and see the monkey statue in Hartlepool.  Wonder at the stupidity of the monkeyhangers.

You should go for a wander around Durham city. Spectacular cathedral and no baying students around.

Peasholm Park in Scarborough for the Battle of the River Plate re-enactment.

Inland, Dalby Forest for walks or cycling.

Further afield, Sutton Bank and the white horse at Kilburn again for walks or cycling. Best on a day when the Yorkshire Gliding Club is active so you can watch the gliders. 

Also York, but don't bother with a river trip (I have done this and it was a bit of a let down). Walk around the walls, go to the railway museum, the Viking centre or the castle museum.

The area around Castle Howard and Malton is nice for walking, and there is Eden Camp which is a second world war museum in a former prisoner of war camp just outside Malton.

Try a country show. Mostly held at weekends but some are held mid-week. The Saturday Yorkshire Post usually has details of shows being held that weekend and the following week.


Second Sutton Bank, voted one of the best views in England. You can walk around the cliff top and see little memorial plaques where people have crashed their gliders.

Good pub in the village below, along with various craft shops.

Took the m1 route up to whitby as rec'd by the mighty laz qc, ma (arts).   Lovely stuff.  Horcum's hole. Moors.  Blue bank. Ace.  Staying in converted (brand new by the look) engine sheds next to the stn with a view of the abbey (anyone wjo wNts details ping me these places are ace).  Fckng love this town.  Whitebait followed by sole for tea.  Awesome.  

I'm moving to the north... ...I'm looking for the equivalent of Icelandic weather, restricted food choices and an impossible to follow language, so I've decided on Northumberland.

Oh, the reason I posted that (Wangster) is that I'd like details please.

I'm going to introduce her to the delights of the newly fractured UK...

Well if she’s still with you after that, she’s a keeper!

Are they busy destroying their own country just for shits and giggles?

Are they busy destroying their own country just for shits and giggles?

Worse, they are selling the island to the highest bidder... ...whole chunks of the country in foreign ownership. It's mental...

Merkz... ...I need the coast and the sea. Northumberland was the only area in the UK I could afford... ...but it is beautiful (at least north of Alnwick)

You probably know this.

Fluffster male me up or send me yours - theshellfishgene at gmail dot com

Bits of East Yorkshire are cheap, but Northumberland is a lot nicer. Why aren’t you looking in places like Orkney or Shetland?

I love Shetland and Orkney and have spent a lot of time there... ...but... ...this time around I need it to be a little easier to get to London on the occasional basis.

I also looked at the Western Isles (most of them) and also thought long and hard about Skye... ...unfortunately it appears to has turned into a form of Center Parcs that is almost impossible to drive around in the summer.


Fluffster male me up or send me yours - theshellfishgene at gmail dot com

I've made contact but sadly there is no way anyone can deal with your lack of maleness... ...I blame the family.

Yeah but your missus asked you to shave down there didn’t she?

Never, tecco, my nethers could pass for a flash gordon era brian blessed