Immediate turn offs in dating profiles

Bubbly

My faith is important to me

No Tories/TERFS/SWERFS (yes I've seen that combination more than once)

Decode the first one, Sails.  What does "bubbly" mean in practice?  

No SMURFS

Do you want the blue book or the white book?

Cars.

Gym selfies.

Business class, usually with a glass of bubbly.

Person stood next to you being quite blatantly an ex.

 

Doesn't bubbly mean they have GERD and belch a lot?

Gym selfies

only close up selfies 

filters, especially animal ones 

What is a TERF or a SWERF. I am not polluting my Google history.

What on earth is swerf?? 
 

"I like to laugh"

"Are there any real men out there"

"I am not here to be your fook buddy" - accompanied by a pic of a tit hanging out.  

Bathroom mirror selfies, especially when you can see the loos in the background. Toilets are not sexy.

+1 bathroom mirror selfies being just cringe.  

Only close up selfies gets a swipe left because they are basically trying to hide the fact they are a fatty.

Negativity in general actually. Anyone who lists what they don't want feels like hard work to me and like something happened to them that they haven't quite gotten over yet...

More than one person in the first picture. I aint got time to be scrolling.

when men say "no drama queens or gold diggers" they can think that but it's just aggressive when it's the first thing you see on their profile

yeah 100% agree with Meh!.

Also the people who say they are competitive about EVERYTHING is off putting. 

well i like 2 ave a laff nd am full of tattoos lol sick of bein treat bad lol want sum 1 who is carin an will tret me right not like wankers av ad so far lol no time waisters plz if u dnt like me its ur lost jog on

+1 Meh.

I don't understand people who use group photos - I tend to see one or two people I like in them then feel let down when I finally work out the 'subject' is actually the ugly fooker stood on the end.  

It's always the least attractive person. So if one of them is not to my liking I will generally swipe left on the lot. 

For those are really not down with the youth TERF is a trans-exclusionary radical feminist which is a woman who doesn't think that trans women are actually women.  Basically JK Rowling.

SWERF is a sex worker exclusionary radical feminist which is a woman who thinks all sex work is wrong and that it can't be something that someone chooses to do because they want to do it.

I always look at all the photos but yes disappointing when you realise the person who's looking to do date is not the one you fancied in the first group photo.

Also what's with people who have photos of motivational quotes and landscapes but no photos of them?

TERF is a trans-exclusionary radical feminist which is a woman who doesn't think that trans women are actually women.

point of information - this is probably true in the sense terf is flung around as an insult these days but jk rowling isn’t really a radical feminist in any traditional sense

germaine greer would be a better example of a terf imo 

I also forgot the terrifying new trend of "don't match with me if you're vaxxed"

Actually I might add no TERFS (tory exclusionary radical feminists).

+1 for the “my faith is important to me”  left swipe

I had a fling with a smoking hot girl at university who was a born again Christian - the most glorious body God ever made and a lot of pent up lust from trying not to get jiggy before marriage. 

I put “No surf and turfs” on my profile.

 
Can’t have people who mix their lobster and steak. 

Anti-vaccer 

Pro trump 

Pro guns 

Q-anon 

Conspiracy theorists 

Basically there is only sort of person I would absolute not date - the alt right.

 

Any religious stuff is a serious red flag for me.

The thing I've had a few times recently from some of the younger crowd is

'Are you into choking?'

and also even worse

'I hope you like choking?'

'Not really?! No.'

It's almost the female equivalent of just sending a girl a picture of your dick, immediately.

Sorry, Mugen

but are these young ladies keen on being choked themselves or is this a thing that they do to you?

#vanillaloverme

Anyone who sticks their tongue out cheekily at the camera.  Especially men

No Tories/TERFS/SWERFS 

I still don't understand. So the (presumably) straight females whose dating profile Sails is looking at expressly state that they don't want to date certain types of radical feminists?

Some of them may be bisexual, pansexual, omnisexual or heteroflexible.

Peter it seems that a lot of ladies under the age of about 28 seem to be really into being choked. It's something that I've noticed on the apps anyway. It's a troubling phenomenon.

wot’s the issue with “no tozzas”

seems like a very wise type to digitally triage early doors

I have just googled that Saillaw and I am 100% not going to download it.

It sounds like a free-for-all polyamory thing.

I don't want to get sent a message like 'Hi Mugs, you look really nice - this is a picture of my husband's boner'.

What happened to that roffer who got involved in that couple next door with the cuck fantasy? Has he been murdered yet?

I’ve already picked the names of the children I want to have. 

Using photos that aren’t of you. 

(Both of those actually happened when I was t’internet dating). 

When google or learn about stuff like Feeld, I feel increasingly like Philip Larkin.

 

Rather than words comes the thought of high windows:   

The sun-comprehending glass,

And beyond it, the deep blue air, that shows

Nothing, and is nowhere, and is endless.

 

When google or learn about stuff like Feeld, I feel increasingly like Philip Larkin.

 

Rather than words comes the thought of high windows:   

The sun-comprehending glass,

And beyond it, the deep blue air, that shows

Nothing, and is nowhere, and is endless.

 

Oops. That was an observation rather than an example of what the OP was looking for.

Although it would probably achieve that effect too.

A sexually active girl that likes Philip Larkin. Do they even exist?

We must be kind, while there is still time 

yes 

well not a girl 

I insta swipe left on anybody who says anything negative in their profile, whether it’s “no short guys” or “No ONS!” ie a type or a reaction to trends in their recent messaging history, I just think that the person has no composure and will be a drag about at least one other thing.

I generally avoid women with dogs too as I know that the dog is going to take up all these time, but then a lot of women seem to take photos of themselves with some other dog, or the family dog, so it isn’t a dealbreaker for me.

No because they can leave the cat at home and it will be happy. It’s dogs that need are yin throughout the day.

Unfortunately Linda, you are taken. Still, there is some solace in knowing you are out there.

'No ONS!'
 

Bloody statistics, eh?
WTAF is this choking thing, tho, srsly?

Pro trump 

Pro guns 

Q-anon 

Conspiracy theorists

----------

I TOLD YOU TO STOP STALKING ME, DAVOS!

Any lady with a small dog is instant no.

Any who feels the need to mention something like being a non-smoker means you know they actually hate that thing.

Those who are too lazy/gross to remove their wedding ring. Yeah I c u

“Person stood next to you being quite blatantly an ex”

You get turned off by people having exes? Are you a member of a cult of virginity?

Also, “no TERFs/SWERFs” would say to me someone’s got sensible politics and we’d likely get on.

Agree re self-identifying as “bubbly” tho. Suggests an irritating combination of personal qualities.

I would deliberately match with anyone who said “don’t match with me if you’re vaxxed”

This thread makes me single. “I’m not going to be your fook buddy” or “no ONS” would get the big fook-off, I think; er well what are you on Tinder for then luv. Anyone who asked me if I liked choking before we’d even met would be filed under weirdo. nb in the interests of balance, if I were surfing to date men I think “no gold diggers” would likely get the sack too.

Generally, nobody’s interested in your arsey list of I’m-too-good-does are they.

Do people really talk about choking as a sort of opening conversational gambit? That sounds terrifying. 

Not just choking and does save going on several dates to then find they have some weird fetish that positively turns you off.

I should add that I’m married and have never been on an internet date so I’m translating my pre-digital requirements 

Not just choking and does save going on several dates to then find they have some weird fetish that positively turns you off.
 

Doesn’t sound bad to me. 

Just come across this gem:

We'll get on if you are a fellow conspiracy theorist aka "critical thinker".  If you wear a mask of have had the vaccine then kindly skip my profile.

I'm hoping you are not vaccinated, don't wear a muzzle and know that something odd is happening and it has nothing to do with the virus.

wot about combinations of these?

eg “pro choking tories!!”

that sounds ok

Is that a tory who likes choking or someone in favour of choking tories?

“I don’t do politics lol” sounds good, send ‘em my way (although my wife will veto).

“Not just choking and does save going on several dates to then find they have some weird fetish that positively turns you off.”

Brilliant insight into Sails’ mind

all tories like choking if you read the news 

Well Laz there's nothing quite as disappointing as finding someone you like and then finding that they can only get off on pegging you while you're gagged.

quit kidding on you don’t like that

Shouldn't be an issue for someone with a public school education, Sailo. 

I quite like tattoos, but not too many of them. Not a fan of them on the chest or neck. Facial piercings not great, bar a nose stud which i think is fine.

I am also married, so have no experience of this, but anyone who has a long list of no no's is probably demonstrating why they are still single and would be on my avoid list.

I say "no Tories". Hopefully it puts off Tories and tory sympathisers. I like gym selfies. 

Annoying things for me include 

- negativity 

- cliches like "loves to laugh"/make me laugh and I'm yours" . (Who doesn't?/I'm not your one man comedy festival)

- brags about travel experience 

- No ethnic diversity in friendship group. (I'm brown). This happens a lot in gay world. 

- no profile text/"filling this is hard. Ask me ". (Make an effort mate)

- people who seem to be living the high life (jumping out of a plane/climbing mountains/wrestling alligators). 

There was one profile who had written an entire profile dissing her past experiences with men. it went on a bit. Quite fascinating really. 

why do 90% of women on Tinder seem to love men with tattoos? 

"We'll get on if you are a fellow conspiracy theorist aka "critical thinker".  If you wear a mask of have had the vaccine then kindly skip my profile.

I'm hoping you are not vaccinated, don't wear a muzzle and know that something odd is happening and it has nothing to do with the virus."

And did you swipe right on Barry the Cuck?

I did out of curiosity but we haven't matched.  Was looking forward to telling her how I love a good conspiracy theory because they crack me up.

“Like nights in or out”

So just nights, then.

 

tede-ing about travel or activism, or "values" in general.

On the flipside, I was impressed by a profile on mysinglefriend.com (remember that one) where the friend had written that the lady in question liked a good Alan Partridge joke, with the closing line "will YOU take her to a cracking owl sanctuary".

that was brilliant. I didn't message her, I was in a relationship at time but was curious. 

You were curious because they'd managed to reference a line in a TV show? The bar is low