If they thought you were surplus to requirements they would not hestitate to bin you.   Also you are never as critical as you think you are.

If you are sure you want to go, dont give a second thought to the firm.

A proper mentor would be someone you can talk to and trust to help you decide this in the way that works best for your career. 

If you can't or won't talk to them about it then they're not your mentor, they might be a supervisor?

at the end or beginning of the day ask your line manager for five minutes and just give them the letter

Agreed with Guy, life moves on and I know it sounds harsh but in a few weeks time you will largely be forgotten.

You need to look after No1, as no-one else there will...

Hopefully they may put you on garden leave, or even offer you a PILON to go now?

What Guy said. Once you're out the door most people won't give you a second thought other than to blame you occasionally for something they've not done.

In terms of practicalities, keep the whole thing very short and sweet. Chances are if you book a meeting with your boss they will know why (I always did). Book that meeting early in the day so it's not hanging over you.

Practice what you are going to say, don't go into detail initially, just something simple like the first four lines of your OP.

Be prepared for them trying to change your mind (and also for them not trying to change your mind which can be quite humbling).

People resign all the time, they will be used to it. 

Yeah law firms aren’t girlfriends. They probably won’t give a shite. Not in a bad way, but people do leave jobs all the time.

It's generally better to be in a job looking for a move than to be unemployed desperately looking for something.

I would not resign without a new ship to jump to unless it is truly unbearable.

Sin Jin Hawke is on the mark.  The hiring market isn't great and you are much better placed to get a new role whilst you are in one.

Hard as it is, take your foot off the gas.   You aren't letting them down. If you resign it is likely your boss will try to talk you down (as they will have an immediate problem covering off the work), your role will be advertised within the week. 

Always take the cowardly approach and work out when your boss is in a meeting late in the day and leave it on their desk just before you head home for the day.

May I please dissect the OP?

I’m a solicitor and have been at my firm for around three years. 

3 years feels like an age at the start of things but is in fact just a short shift. Almost enough for people to gauge your capability and have a sense of whether you are in it for the longer term but not really. Year 1 in any job is finding out how it is done, making sure you don't make a complete tit of yourself; year 2 is doing it to a satisfactory level and reinforcing the sense you were a good hire, accepting advice on how they think it could be done better and adjusting;  year 3 is doing it well and reinforcing the sense in those around you that you are dependable and malleable, manageable and a decent prospect who can adapt, ready to turn to the next level of challenge.  

In that 3 years you will have experienced some things, all grist to the mill, but it takes a minimum of 4-5years at full steam to really start to see off some work projects and see things coming round again for the second time, to build on experience and dispose of marginal frustrations or suspicions about you, to work out frustrations or suspicions about others, to see who the fair weather sailors and journeymen are, and who is in it for the longer term, to show you can go on forwards and upwards, to move from one level to another and start the prove-cycle again. 

2 to 3 of those adaptations, proof periods, upshifts over a decade or more, is what is required before they take you seriously and before you should feel any sense of obligation to take their organisation seriously (if at all).  Any decision to move before that is an entirely fair bail out and a simple transactional arrangement, but the quid pro quo is that their caravan moves on and you will not show on the radar as they do that.  Not meaning to be rude but do not feel more important or obligated than that. it's a sign of your diligence but it is mistaken.   

I’m consistently over my hourly and billing targets, 

Which is minimum delivery to be permitted to continue, and that is shit but has been the deal for the last quarter century. take it or leave it. I do not defend that but it is a true statement.  They want over-delivery at whatever the cost to you or them may be.  

but I’m feeling incredibly burned out and I’m no longer enjoying the job — and it’s gone beyond just “needing a holiday.” 

Then stop.  Well done for honestly diagnosing this.  No amount of fake promise of a positive Faustian pact or come-on overture should turn your head. Be true to yourself, recognise your values and live them. Walk away.  Massive moment, do it, be proud.  They are not worth it. 

I’ve drafted my notice and I’m ready to hand it in, even though I don’t have another job lined up yet. I’m not worried about what I’ll do next, but I’m really scared of actually handing in my notice. I don’t want to feel like I’m leaving the team in the lurch, and I’m anxious about people being disappointed or annoyed in particular the people who have mentored me. 

they've been gaslighting you as they always do.  Here are some things that law firms have you believe and buy into:

• If you leave here you will never work again
• You are lucky to have the job
• No firm has as good clients as we do, and if you leave here you will be doing paralegal level work for a tampon manufacturer at best. There is no world outside this cult.
• the best lawyers work here, the ones who leave had to go because they were crap
• a gap in the CV is a guaranteed death crack and you'll be doomed to running parking control in Penge council offices, if you are lucky.
• if you leave you are letting the side down, being unfair to colleagues, they will find you and eat your cadaver in this world or the next
• burn out and mental impact is for whimps, only the able survive, you're weak Smithers.

All of that is utter crap.  You do you.  Let them continue with this madness until they are divorced, have penis cancer, no friends, don't make the money they aimed for, all is lost.   Feed your soul not their wallets.  Others are striking their deal. You are not letting anyone down.  Work honestly during your notice, keep your head high and show respect, then walk away and don't look back. Colleagues will cope or leave and that's their choice.  Nothing to do with you whatsoever. 

I’ve never resigned before, so I don’t really know what to expect. Any advice or tips? 

It's a transaction. You were contracted to them on terms. You got paid, they demanded stuff from you, you delivered that and they haven't called underperformance. now you get to terminate according to the terms, as with all contracts.  It's not an emotional issue but a right. 

Am I being ridiculous for feeling nervous, and is it likely that people won’t mind as much as I’m imagining?

No.  Not ridiculous.  Very common thoughts.  After a minute of not caring, they may regret it when they consider the inconvenience of having to do some work, but the only thing that lawyers tend to think when people resign is oh shit I've got to do this work AND hire someone else. They will not reflect on whehter they could have treated you better and managed you into being happy and wanting to stay.  No, nobody will "mind" and certainly nobody should criticise you for exercising your rights. This is not indentured slavery, even though they would love it to be.  The gaslighting includes getting you to understand that you should be grateful to everyone, never step away from the grindstone, only weak people do that, that you have inconvenienced everyone by being alive, that you are lucky and should apologise and live in a constant state of compromise of your own needs in favour of those of others' and in fear of insolvency and catastrophic life-changing mental injury as a result of your selfishness. 

FIDO: F uck It Drive On.  Let this be the first day of a life on your own terms. 

Surely having made the decision to leave you're now in the right frame of mind to manage your work load appropriately?  So you can just say to a partner when they ask you to do something that you don't have the capacity.  and mean it.  and simply not accept any cajoling.   very powerful position to be in, and  you might find things different with that new mindset.

or if you do want to hand the notice in - as others have said it's really no big deal, happens all the time.  My own approach is to have a quiet word with the boss and say that i've decided to leave.  the handing over of the letter itself then is almost an afterthought.   With the letter itself I never bother with anything other than i'm terminating my employment with the company on x days notice as per contract, which means my final day is x.  nothing else except perhaps thanks for the opportunity.   the softer bit is the chat.

I have never subscribed to the issue of looking for a job when you are between jobs being a bad thing. It is easier to find a job when you are in a job but you are more likely to make a bad decision based on the addled thoughts of a person under pressure. The best decisions I have made in my life have been when I am refreshed and purposeful. If you cannot make a good case for why you had to step away to make a decent decision then yeah, sure, you will struggle to persuade a buyer that you are the right candidate. But true purpose and focus, truly good decisions, true clarity is achieved away from the confusing noise of a shit life.   Clarity of purpose, energy and ambition, objective reflection are very buyable.  Pricks looking to cash up without reflecting on how or why they do what they do, or who are clearly not quite right in da heid, are very unattractive candidates. 

good advice from bubblebum here 

 My own approach is to have a quiet word with the boss and say that i've decided to leave.  the handing over of the letter itself then is almost an afterthought.   

have a human conversation with the boss person, administration of contractual terms to be managed by HR bot. 

My own approach is to have a quiet word with the boss and have it explained to me that i've decided to leave and that the handing over of the letter itself then is almost an afterthought.   

One point to think carefully on his how permanent the "burnt out" feeling is.    I  hard quit the City after feeling like that for 18 months or more.  I have since felt it for a few months at a time in subsequent jobs but it has passed and I ended up glad I did not act on instinct to quit again.

Guy's comment is fair. I had assumed we were in a real burnout situation and had aimed off for "I'm finding having to work somewhat difficult as a I prefer a cup of hippy tea and a reiki massage, and I don't feel able to be resilient and resent that word as it is the terminology of the patriarchy and it infringes my rights to shag-all and expect to be paid for the pleasure". but I may be presuming.

It is very important not to make dangerously rash impetuous decisions to can your life just because of a hard day or two.  But if it genuinely is a settled state of unhappiness and unsuitability then my earlier advice stands. 

If the partners and HR at your firm are worth anything they will be perturbed at your leaving - nkt because of leaving them in the lurch etc - but because they have allowed you to burn out. It’s on them to a certain extent. So if they are cross, then fvck em. Mostly firms are cross because you are going to a competitor and they feel betrayed. Not the case here.

Best practice is to line up another job before you go.

Then spend 3 months notice doing fk all and not being available for anything they soon get the message.

Minkie

I'm sorry to say I have lost confidence in law firms' claims to care about people.  The financial model, the lack of investment in and respect for individual development, wellbeing etc is appalling across the board when compared with businesses where the measurement of whether you are any good is, erm, whether you are any good, whereas fee earning private practice uses the proxies to which the OP refers of billing and hours.  Any suggestion that a bit of time might be spent developing someone, learning what makes them tick, caring for them and nurturing their interest in the thing they worked so hard to get a chance to do, is just regarded as non-billable time and therefore highly suspect.  Oh, don't get me wrong on this, I see it being said that these things are important, but I don't see it being actually regarded as important.  Private Practice law barely knows the meaning of certain common words (strategy, development, management) and most of their efforts are performative.  I do not therefore agree that Partners or HR in most firms will be perturbed by a person leaving due to burnout.  There is a frankly pathetic self-assuring response that burner-outers are not fit for the journey and should go.   A person can be riding high in a firm but as soon as there are some things going on in their lives that require them to take their eye off the fee earning ball and attend to domestic issues, health and wellbeing, some balance, then the gloves come off and it's piss off you're damaging the bottom line.   I thought it was better and that there were people who did think differently but I was wrong.  I have seen better in-house (even in the hardest of PLC roles in the harshest of times) and in the non-profit sector.

I think we should just admit that the profession is appallingly bad at this and that it is both structural and behavioural. 

Muttley 

Fine words from Mutters. And OP you’ll rarely find anyone in this biz who will take the time to pen so many of them in genuine support of a stranger where no commission is involved

Drive On. 

I would love to think that there is a law firm out there that is full of partners who would be genuinely perturbed by the realisation that they let you burn out.  Even those whose minds allow the notion to flash by as a passing thought are soon set right by the jingle of cash and the sobering jolt of obligation.

Coffee and completions. Sorry to read that you are feeling bruised. And Muttley speaks well to the centring of your career in yourself and your values. Your health and integrity are your only stick in trade (if you're three years in, core competence should be a given).  And in the absence of the below, the advice on self and a short letter and brief meeting is perfect. 

However, you mention mentors. Have any moves on to other firms? Would they not be worth sounding out as a sense check and maybe even a steer to a new opportunity?

Mutters, I thought about you as saw the FCA are looking for non execs. But that aside, would you be interested in being part of a firm that was more as you describe? People over bottom line?

To summarize the mutt dog: fck em

Hey Deemus.

I'm in a public role and I have a second NED role on a committee of the board of another public authority. Two jobs is fine and they will serve me well for the future as I will have the pick of certain NED roles, if that's what I want ahead, given my current commitments.  Can't be more specific than that but thank you for thinking of me.  It's been a heck of a journey from bar, to MC law firm to in-house to law firm again and out to the public sector over 32 years. I am blessed. 

Of all the experience I have had along that road, the time as a partner in a law firm for the past decade was the period I have the least affection for.  I learned very little, they took a lot, I left conflicted. I could not look young lawyers in the eye and tell them it was all ok and worth battling for or the ethics of the organisation were sound.

I would not work in a law firm even if it was run by a four partner magic combo of George Harrison, the Dalai Lama, St Francis of Assisi and Mahatma Ghandi.  They were all fine people, as many law firm partners may be, but the nature of the work and expectations, the way the business operates, it makes being a decent human being a liability to the business not an asset.  You have to decide whether you are with it or against it.  The shitheads win. Good people have to find something else to do or they de facto become shitheads by thinking they are good people but being owners of a business that is smashing people to pulp.  

I would not work in a law firm even if it was run by a four partner magic combo of George Harrison, the Dalai Lama, St Francis of Assisi and Mahatma Ghandi.

also the lack of gender diversity would jar.  

Indeed it might, but the discussions at lunch would be epic. Perhaps chuck Philippa Foot into the mix.  And a damned good St Estephe.

I really get it on the law firm front. But I think that there is a real opportunity giving into view on a different kind of firm. More actual partnership and capped drawings. Counsel rather than blind execution (ie the anti AI).

Philippa Foot wouldn’t have been seen dead in a law firm. Nor would any self respecting philosopher fyi. 

On your last para, then the question is why does one do it? Is it for the money or the pleasure? If the money, then do what they all do and chase only the money and throw all other considerations (such as care for others - OP) in the bin.  If the pleasure of being "counsel rather than blind execution (the anti AI)" then at the tail end of one's profession there are many, many opportunities to give good advice, really live in the complexity and detail, be paid for your time, solve problems, be decent to people and develop them, do all sorts of nourishing things and not have it all bent to fukkery by the demands of a business whose only business line is the sale of units of time.

i met a chap the other day at an event at Bonhams - so a no-lawyer environment, thankfully. He ran his own marketing agency. He had been at a conference with a managing partner of a big law firm giving one of the speeches, who he described as "an eminently forgettable shade of dull beige". I know the person in question and in his own bubble (a blend of self-regard and law firm echo chamber) he would regard himself as charismatic, a bon viveur, a polymath and great company, very dynamic, a true standout leader and individual in a sea of lawyer faces.  .  What makes a good law firm partner does not make a good persons Good people can be law firm partners but it will whittle them down to grey, smoothed-off husks. What makes them good in their firms makes them really quite dull in the company of wider society.    

“What makes them good in their firms makes them really quite dull in the company of wider society.”

And there you have it. 

Well, quite mutters. So fvck em.

V much what Singun sed. If I was a new employer after you’ve taken time out to work out what you want to do with your life, I’d be worried about your time out of the market and that the real reason you had left was because you were pushed. I would also worry about whether in reality you’d ’got your head back together’ and also about the risks of something similar happening again. I’d probably therefore see you as a potentially high risk candidate, who wouldn’t necessary around for their new team when the going got tough.

Nearly always better to search for the new work while still in a job, imo  

I might do this too

Sigh

Heh @ theRealist's reading of the room. 100% big law partner.

Can't remember who the realist is but Academic is famously someone of whom not to give a shyt about the opinion.

There will be judgemental bellends who think ooh ooh they were sacked. These are the ones you don't want a new job from. They are stupid.

There will be people who listen to what you say, judge you on how you present, and want to hire you. These are the ones you want to work for.

So in some ways leaving without a job to go to is a good way of making sure the next person you work for isn't a dickless coward.

Ranting aside, Mutters' advice is good.

I don't really hold with the people who say you don't mean much to the people you work for, they won't care. They might. Doesn't mean you have to stay in the same role your whole life when you're not happy.

It's normal to feel nervous about this, but it doesn't have to be a big thing. Just talk to one of your mentors about needing to do something different for your mental health. You'll find out very quickly if they really care about you, or only about the work you do for them.

That wasn't ranting. it was reasoned expression. 

You'll know when I am ranting. The swearing increases, the punctuation erodes to zero and the gentle understatement is replaced by vicious and specific identification of culprits, an impassioned rallying cry to the masses to overthrow the khuntocrats and a complete loss of fear of libel laws, propriety and sense of time, danger is rightly apprehended by bystanders, and mothers rush their children indoors and draw the curtains, while urgent calls are made to the police, church, fire brigade, ambulance service and Guinness Book of Records. 

Wot Mutters said is true, but a deeply depressing reflection of the modern world, where money and functionality are more important than technical competence (let alone brilliance) or professional pride.

My dear Mutters (and how glad I am to see such punctuation and lack of Oxford com(m)a), I get it. 

I suppose I think there is still room for an actual profession. In some ways what the old advisory banks used to do. I had a pretty good dragging up (by way of the bar, largish firm on Bishopsgate and then international outfits) before getting out, where one was expected to look to a destination Rather than simply the next plot point. And now see a lack of actual advice from the firms we come across. So possibly an outfit acting as a concierge and helping the weary traveller do what they want to do. And train up the next lot too. It doesn't have to be an automaton infested vipers' nest. Nor third sector pob spec. At least I don't think it does. 

There are other things to do but this one keeps niggling at me. And it would be better for decent, capable and intellectually curious people. You'd fit that hat. 

Great advice by Mutters. Good luck Coffee!

Deemus 

Thanks. This is actually a really good conversation about a bigger thing. The theory of what you say is something I agree with - there should be a place for a different model and different behaviours. However, I think it is important to accept that two things have changed irrevocably: the culture in the market as described above, where values and behaviours are eroded without partners recognising that it is driven by pricing and profit chasing; the buyer (client) demand is energising that. It is not just about law firm owners. Despite what is said (oh we need you to be our trusted strategic partner, our consiglieri; oh we want long term thinking; oh we want diversity and unorthodox and creative minds… etc) clients regard legal services as a procurement exercise, where cost trumps value in the final decision. Value adds fall by the wayside. Corporate timeframe is just weeks and months - financial quarters.  Pricing wins pitches. All those values are veneer. It’s a race to the bottom. Listed company shareholder ROE anxiety drives bad behaviour from the finance side which bleeds into every spending department including legal. Private equity is all about carry so cost line andmargin management is first instinct. Private and family offices are some of the most aggressively cost conscious clients. Public sector just can’t waste funds. So all sectors of client are causing this. 
If clients turned around and said no, we want something different and we will pay for it then things might change. Shithead LLP would not win. But this was a debate when I was in-house when my now very adult children were babies. We wanted the hourly rate to sue and to identify the wrong law firm behaviours, but guess who won that game? So I can tell you it is a nice pipe dream but it is not happening. The professional jas been going in a nasty direction for more than a generation. 

Decent human beings I worked with as a youngster and respected (and who taught and nurtured me) have not been in vogue since the millennium and would not be accommodated in a partnership that wanted to be competitive to meet client demand. 

Die not sue 

Agree with others - not just great advice from Muttley but imagine having someone take so much time to think about, and then address your concerns on an anonymous board?  Great stuff.

Just to add one more suggestion - I worked at an aggressive law firm in M&A in the 90s with zero humanity and probably had similar feelings of burnout but then left for in-house and honestly the difference was just night and day.   Everyone is just so much more human in-house, so please also consider that.  

the idea of carving up your day into 6 minute increments is just barbaric to me - i've no idea how i lasted 7 years in PP.

But this is what profession - as opposed to trade - is about. It does not matter whether you are paid for it or know the person, you have a responsibility as a senior member of a profession to sow seeds of values and behaviours, to create the world you want to inhabit. How a profession maintains its bearings - or loses them - is not a matter of luck. It’s a question of how much the senior end of the profession care. The torch must be carried. It comes not from podium speeches and board meetings but from small scale engagement with actual people who will take that torch and carry it for people who come after them. Think global act local - This is a great place for some of that. 

I observe that previous generations of lawyers had enough slack built into their firms - basically because the work was less competitive - that there was at least a chance that professional values would be handed down in some way. No guarantee of it though, certainly at the end of things or firms less esteemed than others. That is long gone, through a combination of greed and complacency. And those of us who suffered from the greed and complacency of others, who couldn’t be bothered to train us or just caned us in terms of workload or lack of career progression, are now not minded to seek out juniors to impress them with our more Corinthian values. Values which to them look positively ante diluvian after decades of change.

then left for in-house and honestly the difference was just night and day.   Everyone is just so much more human in-house, so please also consider that.  

This. It honestly felt like I got my life back when I moved in-house, so definitely worth considering.

My move  in-house at about 11 years qual was similarly revelatory. Probably the most validating years of my professional life.  

The most delightful feeling was that I was being measured on the quality of the work I was doing, not my time recording. It was not the quantity of hour. Quite the opposite, in fact, as timeliness and efficiency were a highly prized attribute so if you could listen to a question, answer it there and then orally, give good practical and commercial support underpinned by strong legal analysis but not in slavery to that analysis, and provide a quick written summary of action points if needed, then you were performing well. If that took or was too long you were not. Every day was an exam in which it was possible to get an A* and every day ran by fast in a hurly-burly of demand. Every day was different to the previous and the years rolled by. They were attentive to personal development, career progression, line management and stretch opportunity, money was invested in London Business School leadership development programs and MBAs, you were expected to manage and lead and everybody knew those were different things and each required commitment of time and, above all, you needed to enjoy that and prioritise it.

I am back in an in-house public role and it is similarly testing. The thrill is in the decision making, breaking down cultures of meetings and being a good at judging things, keeping everyone on a sensible bearing, aiming for outcomes not fannying about in the water-treading world of over-engineered whatiffery.