Dentons CEO

He praised himself for putting his family first and not attending a meeting so he go to his son's football match..

Smug. A ridiculous thing to boast about especially considering he is a male in the most senior position. How wonderful it was to choose his moment ...to attend a football match.. win win. I wonder if he would do the same if he was called home urgently to attend to something less exciting. I hope all his staff with no such choice and with dependants now feel comfortable to do the same for urgent family situations and also for planned lovely family "events". 

I am sick of all the self congratulation on linkedin. I am surprised he did not call himself a rising star, or hold up a trophy or call it part of his journey..ffs.  

 

considering he is a male
 

women get away with this shit waaaay more

everyone thinks a women who is ceo and has kids is a “super mum”

loads of men do it just the same but don’t get the praise

well done this guy for claiming some  parenting valour for the men! Finally!

I agree.  
 

we single middle aged people get shat on because we are the ones left having to do the work when smuggo parent goes to little Johnny’s sports day or Lottie’a nativity play. 

Women do not get away with it. They often HAVE to make a difficult choice to not be somewhere or attend something to sort out a problem as main carers. They usually have no choice and often have to seek permissions, apologise, take annual leave, not have lunch breaks, make up the time that evening whilst exhausted and face disapproval...and of course, it impacts on how committed they are perceived by the seniors (usually men). 

We middle aged people should be working to ensure HR policies and flexible working policies are fair for everyone. We may have been the ones who had, or who still are, juggling everything and know full well how difficult it is.  Who does the school call first if one of the children fall ill? Or the neighbour if elderly mum or dad have fallen over?  the Mother. 

Davos2021 agree, But imagine if you got an urgent call and HAD to leave (again) and had to tell one of those senior, single, middle aged people who are furious with you ? 

All the people criticising him: are you suggesting it would have been better if he:

1) had attended a meeting and let down his family; or

2) had gone to the match but not mentioned it, and so not tried to imbue a sense of work/life balance in his staff.  

Disagree that it's the mother that always has to do that stuff - that may be true in your relationship and many others - but isn't true in mine.

But equally we both miss out on kids stuff due to work. That's life. We picked these careers and neither of us are going to take the foot off the gas.

But it's nonsense for a CEO to say something like that and think it's the same for everyone else in the business.

What makes the OP think his staff “have no such choice”?

Hes right to point to his success at work/life balance management.

Being male has nothing to do with it, you cretin 

3 ducks 

He should have done what others had to do in his firm in that situation. If he is satisfied that everyone could have done the same then fine. If he thought he was doing something unusual , new or from a position of power (which it seems to be) then shut up and start changing the policies for all the firm. 

Is there any fooking evidence whatsoever that a more junior employee at dentons wouldn't have the same flexibility or be praised for using it, you abject moaning aunts?

When there is a genuine sharing of all the caring responsibilities on all the women, mothers, female carers then that is something to applaud. And when there are an equal proportion of women in CEO roles too. 

I just don't get why people know how to broadcast everything they do now, tireless self promotion, its embarrassing. 

This: then shut up and start changing the policies for all the firm. 

The stuff I missed as a parent working in pp vastly outweighed the stuff I was able to attend.  And frankly with hourly target-based performance assessment, any time off created a bigger headache than it was often worth.  You sit there watching "Little Lottie's play" (literally in my case) feeling guilty for being there and rushing back to the office afterwards.  It's awful actually. 

Completely different now I'm in house; so long as I do the work I can do what I like.

None of this has a place on LinkedIn.

 

Or the neighbour if elderly mum or dad have fallen over?

They call me because I don't have the luxury of siblings or a partner to deal with and have to deal with all all day every day.  However, I'm happy to skip work for the day if I've been up since 5am dealing with paramedics and scrubbing blood out of the carpet and I'm not senior but just work with sane reasonable human beings.

You sit there watching "Little Lottie's play" (literally in my case) feeling guilty for being there and rushing back to the office afterwards.  It's awful actually. 

Never had this issue but I've always treated targets as aspirational and never had any trouble if I've come reasonably close but missed them. Once again that may reflect on my choice of employers and having quit the one firm I worked out where that might have been the prevailing attitude.

It is exactly because he’s in the most senior position that he should be saying things like this. Set the tone from the top. His employees should now follow his example.

If he was praising someone like an associate for telling him to "fook-off with his BS internal meeting, I'm hanging with my family today" then, ok.

But praising himself. What a dumb aunt

That may be right SS and fair play to anyone who can take a half day off and immerse themselves in it.  I always felt the pressure to be back at work; the emails keep flooding in, you get missed calls, you know you've missed stuff you'll need to catch up on and will likely end up staying late because you took the morning off.  Depends on the firm, obviously, but that was my experience.

What a CEO says and does is no guarantee that things will change. It will be interesting to see if the board are working on a fully flexible family friendly policy now which is fully implemented and does allow all employees to do the same.  

Well lets see. 

Things need to change in many places and quite frankly it is cringing for Denton's that their CEO was bleating on about the remarkable thing he did as a Dad to watch football. 

What a CEO says and does is no guarantee that things will change. It will be interesting to see if the board are working on a fully flexible family friendly policy now which is fully implemented and does allow all employees to do the same.  

It's far less about the policy than the culture. And the culture comes from the top with little things like this. 

Sorry when did you start in this lovely profession as I remember the days before associates had mobile phones and access to e-mail outside the office and the world didn't stop turning if you weren't at your desk for a few hours?  In fact you could be out of contact for a week and colleagues would deal with stuff and it would all be fine.  That has coloured my views as things have got faster and made me more inclined to switch off from time to time and deal with it all later.

People are always posting about this stuff on LinkedIn. It's just a flex to say they can't be fired for slacking off. 

Get a junior senior associate to post that they've gone to the driving range in their own instead of a meeting because their golf is important to them and see how that goes.

One for the notice period to do list.

Qualified 2006, I didn't have a blackberry for a year or two post-qualification.  Then I did and then it all changed...

I'd agree with the sentiment of your message though that everyone whips each other up into needing to respond all the time.  And I was part of it / couldn't say no.

 Who does the school call first if one of the children fall ill? Or the neighbour if elderly mum or dad have fallen over?  the Mother. 
 

sorry to hear your husband is like this MissorMs. In my marriage, the school and child minder have my number, not my wife’s. 

i actually had to give them a dressing down because when they called me up for a ‘bumped head’ they asked to speak to my wife.

as with many of these complaints from “feminists”, really you are just complaining about the deal you have struck with your own husband.

Not to mention the assumption that everyone who is of an age to have elderly parents is married with a wife who deals with such things.  It's one step below asking if I've ever come close to getting married.

Yes, this vile example set by a senior manager of prioritising family in any way, and any suggestion by him that there should be of actual cultural change in that direction must be shut down immediately and everyone concerned castigated as the vile mysoginists they are.  Why, if this sort of thing were to be encouraged, where on earth would we get to?  Quite obviously not greater tolerance for and valuing of these sort of family considerations, which is what the OP wants, no, the only way to such an outcome like that would be for that awful man and people like him to keep absolutely silent about it and not encourage others by example and thereby publicly signalling to peers and staff that this is in any way ok. 

Lol.  Person takes steps to encourage family values and people are absolutely furious.       

The point is its a male CEO virtue signalling and congratulating himself on missing a meeting to go to his sons football match claiming family come first. Is he really encouraging family values? Can anyone in his Firm do what he did then?

I really feel for you Sails - I am not sure people know how hard it is to be middle aged and single, especially with needy elderly parents.  At least I have my sister.  

It's really really really tough having to deal with stuff from work stress to parent stress with no emotional support.  No-one to give you a hug.  And for me last year no financial support as well when I was unemployed in the pandemic - couldn't tell my parents how dire my situation was because dad is so old and mum going through her chemo

Judy - you come across as very huggable, can’t believe there aren’t lovely real world people who’d hug you. Virtual hug sent. Not single but struggling with toddler and very needy elderly parents. 

Seniors can always suit themselves. Reading about the credit crunch, it's apparent that Wall Street CEOs were still going out to dinner with their families as their industry was on the verge of total collapse. I think it was John Mack or Dimon who got pissed off when Dick Fuld rang them over dinner to propose a merger.

If all the parents in his firm took that approach, then surely he would have a lot of disgruntled singles/non-parents to deal with who would likely get pissed off picking up the slack.  Well, HR would anyhow.

I think that is the point that I am trying to make.

People get lauded for missing meetings for kid's sports events.  It would probably be frowned upon if I miss a non client meeting to get my hair done or wander around a gallery for an hour or so 

Surely this isn’t very complicated.

It is a good thing if workers are given the ability to balance the demands of their work with the demands of their non-work lives. 
 

This is true regardless of sex and regardless of what those demands are - whether parenting or anything else. 
 

Partners/CEOs might do well to consider that it is rather easier for them to do this than people more junior in their organisations. 
 

Anything I’ve missed out? Not sure why this has degenerated into a “call yourself a feminist?!” argument. 

Judy

Can you imagine a junior opting out of a meeting at Dentons then posting on Linkedin " guess what big thing I did today, I opted out of a meeting today to get my hair done and wander around a gallery because mental health comes first". 

 

 

Heh @ missor.  I remember as a junior working 70+ hour weeks (not law) covering for senior managers who just had to leave at 5 to see their kids/teenagers. aunts.

Isn't a better question why they felt it necessary to schedule a (probably not super urgent) internal meeting on a Saturday? Rather than scheduling the meeting and then cancelling it at the last moment, surely a much better approach would have been for the relevant senior partner to make sure it didn't take place at the weekend in the first place?

“The point is its a male CEO virtue signalling and congratulating himself on missing a meeting to go to his sons football match claiming family come first. Is he really encouraging family values? Can anyone in his Firm do what he did then?”

This absolutely is NOT the point, you slack-jawed moron. And stop mentioning his sex as a pejorative, or I’ll cancel you immediately and pass your file to the Equalities Commission.

How many of those complaining have actually asked to reschedule a meeting and been told no?

Clients (if not law firm partners) are usually pretty understanding about it if you actually ask. I bet most of the time people just accept the invite and say nothing. Speak up for yourselves and you may be pleasantly surprised by how flexible people (if not law firm partners) are prepared to be.

Littlers the aunts in that scenario are not the people going home to see their family but the bosses insufficiently resourcing thir teams such that 70 hour weeks are necessary (which ftaod they very very rarely are). 

Fwiw I’ve no idea about the culture at Denton’s, if the ceo is fostering a culture of grown up working where people can do family committments (or, frankly, get their hair done) during the working week provided they get their work done, then great, but as above I’d be surprised if many juniors at the firm or non fee earners felt sufficiently empowered to do this.

70+ hr weeks may not be necessary for juniors in law firms zero. I wouldn't know.  Yes, agreed, the senior managers should have resourced the team, but they failed to do so and they created a competitive culture of silly hours amongst juniors in the first year of their careers.

I duck out between about 5 and about 7.30 everything day to do kid shit. Then get back to work afterwards. It means that if I'm billing more than 8 hours a day I'm normally at the desk until 10pm at least. Shot job, ngl.

I don't think any juniors pick up any of this though. To they extent they're working during this period it's work I would have delegated to them anyway.

I suspect that whilst the internal meeting did exist. And whilst he did cancel it for the football match. It was the product of some leadership course where the suggestions are to do something like this  and then parade it on social media like its an achievement.

A kind of "this is what great leaders do.." spiel. 

Rubbish of course. 

That is what Linkedin has become, the look at me forum or Look what I have done (which I am trying to make sound sincere, genuine, humble, make a difference blah blah )  but is still attention seeking. Now, if he had added that his lightbulb decision making moment was following their existing policy on family friendly working, or, he was now implementing such a policy with immediate effect it it would have been more credible. 

 

I just had a quick read through the LinkedIn comments.  He got some push back for his position, but the comments are mostly congratulating him. It's all very cringe reading professionals congratulate virtue signalling. 

"It would probably be frowned upon if I miss a non client meeting to get my hair done or wander around a gallery for an hour or so"

If one of my staff did this, I'd say fair play to them.