Dave Cameron's texts, whatsapp messages and emails

"can I give you lunch"?  Is he a frickin' sandwich delivery boy?

wasn’t he going to make multiple hundreds of millions on a successful float? 

Isn't this just classic sales guy guff? Not sure what is so needy. 

Jelly, if he hadn't written it that way, the tabloid journo version of heffalump would have written a headline that read

"DC text to [MP]: "CAN I BUY YOU...?" 

Shocking needy text in which DC offers to buy Sir whowahtnow...

some lunch.

DC offers to give his pal [a] nosh 

 

And Giles Coren explodes his rage all over a hapless sub-editor. 

 

 

DC here.  Sorry to bother you again, but nobody seems to be getting back to me on the incredibly urgent business of making my shares in Greensill go up exponentially buying finance from Greensill.  It really is incredibly important that someone gets back to me so I can make off like a bandit.  for the good of the country in these difficult times.  Ciao ciao mwah mwah lunch lunch.  DC xx

How much of his time did he spend copying and pasting “There’s a problem you can help solve!” into multiple text messages? 

I know there has to be an angle, but it’s a bit of a tacky sales trick. Desperation by that point, I suppose. 
 

He was paid to lobby, and that’s what he did. It just didn't work on this occasion. 
 

I thought this guy was a complete penis when he was PM, and I was right. Most of u guys loved him and were ragging on his predecessor Gordon Brown, who was obviously miles better. U TOOLS.

playftse4me11 May 21 17:45 ReplyReport

Isn't this just classic sales guy guff? Not sure what is so needy

bradders m7, is there anything this corrupt bloke has done u won’t try to defend? it’s like when he was mocked for shagging a pig’s head u always leapt to his defence

He was just doing what he used to do at Carlton presumably

Could you imagine him texting girls. Needy little sniveller. 

bradders m7, is there anything this corrupt bloke has done u won’t try to defend?

THANKFULLY, SOME PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THAT THEIR PLACE AND THAT IT IS NOT FOR THEM TO QUESTION THEIR BETTERS!!

I AM SURE THAT DAVID CAMERON DID NOTHING WRONG AND THERE WAS NO IMPROPRIETY

DID YOU KNOW HE WENT TO ETON?

kinda depressing the amount of money poured into buying this guy's education just so he could sit under a bridge and beg his mates for money for a dodgy Australian pyramid scheme

the whole thing is just a sign of how far a person can fall. From UK PM to a grubby grabbing sales "fixer".

The weirdest bit is signing of "Dc".  This tells me that DAVE is more important than CAMERON or that he doesn't want to sound like DA CAPO.

the whole thing is just a sign of how far a person can fall. From UK PM to a grubby grabbing sales "fixer".
 

Alternatively it demonstrates that being a grubby grabbing sales fixer is no bar to gaining the highest office in the land (perhaps even an advantage)

He’s also clearly not very good

have we had much insight into why hmg said no to Greensill? 

This is what's really depressing about politics now. You could rely on millionaires to be principled in the past, even if you didn't like those principles.

Must be galling for him being hung out to dry by the Tories, who seem to forget they were on their way to oblivion before he arrived. Even his referendum decision strengthened them in ways he couldn't have foreseen. 

What chimp said. He has just returned to his previous lobbying life

"give you lunch" was a bit WTF, wasn't it

give me lunch? give you lunch

did he mean

pay for lunch?

gift you the benefit of his vaunted presence for a midday meal?

literally hand you some sandwiches in a paddington bear lunch box?

Genuinely fascinating stuff. Fascinating for the relaxed joviality of the texts and emails - love the ‘this is bonkers’ - when anyone who can translate posh English can just smell the desperation behind it. 

They should be rolled out as a lesson in Anti-bribery and corruption training as to what dodgy behaviour really looks like rather than the Russian bogeyman who usually features. 

the whole thing is just a sign of how far a person can fall. From UK PM to a grubby grabbing sales "fixer".

Leaving out the "sales" part of the quote, the same goes for Clegg, now VP of Global Affairs at Facebook. It gives me a sad that he would take such a job.     

Chief PR man for Facebook. Not a job for people who want peaceful sleep. 
 

It’s a consequence of politicians getting younger and finishing political careers when they have many working years ahead and of actually needing to make money instead of retiring to their country estate. Forced to trade on their connections to raise money to live 

“Dc” just comes off so unimpressive here. A wheedling little flunky. Is this all it takes to get the top job?