competitions u would have 💯 % tried 2 win, had u known about them
The Oracle of Delphi 26 Sep 23 08:44
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I was practicing [s[ept]ic] this at the weekend

i love the ache in ur shoulder the next day - knowing u really tried hard 2 get those nine bounces

I would also suggest that skip number is the more impressive stat.  Otherwise you can just do a huge first bounce for distance which i would say is easier than a proper barnes-wallacer

I guess you may need to have VAR or Hawkeye in the mix for skip count.  Some of those late-stage, vinegar skips can turn into a trembled mess and it's hard to count 'em.

other beach-dad-skills:


mahoosive holes


catching crabs with bare hands

not showing weakness in cold water.


The skill of crabbing is knowing that, whilst all the other hapless boobs are fiddling about with raw bacon, the thinking crab about town will prefer a crushed up M&S mini sausage

It's when Adidas design a £400 carbon-fibre aero stone with kevlar rim and diamond core that you know it's jumped the shark.

You can judge by skips. A good skim surfs across the surface for a long distance while spinning before it sinks, when it’s no longer skipping.

My eldest has now mastered the art of skimming, which makes them very happy.

My old flat mate competed in that competition once. He finished top 5.