District Judge admits pulling sickie to play computer games
27 November 2009
A British judge has claimed to have pulled a sickie after playing Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 all night.

He made the claim in an interview with The Times newspaper, which reported that Will Statton (not his real name) is a 48-year-old "district judge at a county court in England". Judge Statton's secret shame is apparently a craving for violent computer games, and when CoD:MW2 went on sale he queued outside his local HMV from 11pm, waiting for the doors to open at midnight. "Like Charlie waiting outside the chocolate factory", as he put it.

Guilty as charged

 
The judge then spent the night gunning down innocent civilians, before "feigning sickness to get out of his commitments despite the chaos that would inevitably follow".  

The article also contained the following additional clues to his identity: he is married, has two children,  was a barrister for 15 years, and really should grow up a bit.