Exclusive: Judge's fantastic instructions for interns revealed
31 March 2017
An Indian Judge has put together a no-holds-barred instruction manual for interns.

Justice Gautam Patel of the Bombay High Court is attributed as the author of the 13 page "Interns' Starter Kit", which appears designed to deter crappy ones from applying. In his introduction the judge advised that the most important attribute is passion, which, "must be the stuff that makes you want to deny yourself sleep". He warned, "If you're not beginning to feel like this, you're probably not doing the right thing and I have no time of place for you". 

Justice Patel wants YOU! Probably not you, actually.

The judge is known in India for delivering zingers in his judgments and he admitted to prospective interns reading his guide that "you will find some of it funny: that's intentional". But, he added, "all of it is serious". In an expansive and occasionally brutal 29-point section headed "Interning: The UnFAQ" he provided guidance on everything from dress codes to loo etiquette, including the following top tips:



 







Justice Patel's infamous sense of humour was also on display throughout the document, particularly when he (jokingly?) ordered interns to laugh at his gags:



He also established the new standard term for the aircon setting which induces hypothermia: "Justice Patel Cold":



As comprehensive as Justice Patel's guide to getting sacked was, he admitted that women's clothing was in his blind spot. Men's clothing and grooming, however, was not.:

 

Despite his harsh language, Justice Patel may actually have a heart of gold, or at least a bronze aorta. His kit included the edict that "my staff is family", who were "to be treated gently and respectfully at all times". As for holidays:



Here's the full document. Crib away, UK judges: