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Main Discussion

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Osama
Posted - 20 April 2017 12:30
Mutts 4 PM
🐤🐤🐤 is voting Conservative
Posted - 20 April 2017 12:31
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I'm minded to agree with the Bottmeister on this one.

It's just too soon after the last one. And, annoyingly, we'll definitely have to wait 5 years before the next which is too long.
#lockuptheorangeclown!
Posted - 20 April 2017 12:39
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The absence of excitement is more than compensated for by the copious terror imho
minkie
Posted - 20 April 2017 12:51
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Heh Dux my suspicion is that the full five yearswait until the next GE was in fact the deciding factor for an early elevtion now. More important than increasing the Con majority ( which I dont think will happen).
Hank is voting Labour
Posted - 20 April 2017 12:55
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Referendum and the last US presidential were also considered foregone conclusions a few months out. We live in volatile unpredictable times so don't give up hope of a bit of excitement just yet.
Darcy's Voting LibDem
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:03
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Well I won't hold my breath....the only exciting thing would be if the remainer Tories all decided to vote LibDem or Labour and I can't see that happening...
stardust
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:05
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Not to go all Yorkshire Man Sketch on you, but I was bored on day one. I have serious fatigue when it comes to politics at the moment, it's just a never ending bombardment of bullsh1t.
🐤🐤🐤 is voting Conservative
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:05
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"which I dont think will happen"

You don't think the Conservatives will increase their majority?! WTF They're 21 points ahead in the polls (24 according to today's Times).
stardust
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:09
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And polls are aaaallwaaaaays correct.
🐤🐤🐤 is voting Conservative
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:11
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LOL

The margin of error would have to be unprecedented in the history of polling.
stardust
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:12
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It's early days, though. I think the quantity of your foul should not be ascertained as yet.
stardust
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:12
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*fowl
Darcy's Voting LibDem
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:14
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Labour probably have to almost ignore Brexit and focus on poverty and the grimness of the poor's life (poor meaning anyone on less than 70k I think )
ReggiePerrin is voting Lib Dem
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:16
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ducks, there's a devil's advocate argument to the effect that the polling numbers are just Tory votes being piled up in already-Tory areas. There isn't that much headroom for the Tories in terms of winning new seats. It is a racing certainty that they will lose seats to the Lib Dems in the south. Labour are already down to 229, and even Michael Foot managed to hold 209 seats in 1983. The SNP are not going anywhere in most of Scotland.

Don't get me wrong, I believe that May will win with an increased majority, but spouting poll numbers doesn't give the full picture.
stardust
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:18
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We should play election bingo:

1. Ordinary working families
2. The poor
3. The arrogant rich
4. The unfair system
5. We stand for fairness
6. Any speech where they make a statement and wait a couple of seconds for it to sink in and then....slowly...try...and wrap up the speech....by making....a sentient point...and then....saying the final thing. Pause. Applause from the audience.

It's all the same every time.
Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:19
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I think there comes a moment where you look around and realise that the people in Parliament are of a similar age as you and- with very very few exceptions - are just crap at it, which I partly forgive as at least they are giving time to public service but what I don't forgive is the arrogance in their manner, left or right. There is a breathtaking conceit and a habit of telling people "what is right". I think , Brown, Cameron, Osborne etc were the high water mark Dark Decade of this but May and Corbyn, Sturgeon, Farage, Farron etc are really just as trenchant even though they pretend to be an alternative set of voices. The word Trump can be inserted here viz the USA.
It is so much easier and yet more useless to be dogmatic, certain and dictatorial than it is to confront the realities of modern life and politics where the exam answer is actually that it's all rather difficult and complexly crystalline and nobody is "right" on it all. We need far more sophisticated people in Parliament but we have turgid rentagobs like Diane Abbott, Chris Grayling, Liz Truss, Tom Watson.
This is a total remedial class of opinionated twats who are not fit to hold a job in the private sector.
Darcy's Voting LibDem
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:22
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I think being older means one has less and less respect for politicians or indeed anyone, whereas once one looked at older people and they had some relative gravitas at 50 vs your own age of say 35
Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:26
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Not sure I entirely agree with the "or indeed anyone" point. I think you just become more discerning. For example, 10 years ago I may have thought all teenagers were a pile of fetid wank whereas I have quite a lot of time for this generation now as I think they are something very different to the 25-40 year old lot. Quite a bit of respect there where it wasn't when I was younger.
But you do expect people in public office to be worthy of it and what you discover is that a lot of people go into politics because they are windbagging cockmonkeys.
Osama
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:29
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yep
i abhor the being told what to think mentality

just run stuff already
ReggiePerrin is voting Lib Dem
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:30
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But you do expect people in public office to be worthy of it

Why?
stardust
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:32
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It is so much easier and yet more useless to be dogmatic, certain and dictatorial

Mutters, you should download and listen to the Brian Eno episodes on the Adam Buxton podcast. He talks about how this sort of language seems to be the norm across politics - talking in absolutes as if things aren't actually that complicated (when they are) to sort out. Was a very interesting interview, think you'd enjoy it.
🐤🐤🐤 is voting Conservative
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:38
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It does when psephology is sophisticated enough to take into account geographical nuances. Electoral Calculus, which does just that, predicts the Tories will BOSS it. That's good enough for me.


ReggiePerrin
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:16
spouting poll numbers doesn't give the full picture.
ReggiePerrin is voting Lib Dem
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:41
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ducks, you were quoting aggregate vote shares. The psephological mechanism behind how those shares were arrived at isn't the point. It's how the % numbers translate into seats. To do that, you need to perform another piece of analysis, and I saw no sign in your 13.05 post that this has even occurred to you.
Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:44
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psephological


oooh. 'ark at 'er.
Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:46
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when psephology
oooh
is sophisticated enough to take into account geographical nuances
oooooooh.
Electoral Calculus, which does just that,
oooooooooooh
predicts the Tories will BOSS it

ah.

Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:47
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thanks dusty - will check that out.
ReggiePerrin is voting Lib Dem
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:48
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It works better as a poem, Botti.


"The General Election" by 3-ducks (aged 14/88)

It does when psephology
is sophisticated enough
to take into account
geographical nuances.

Electoral Calculus - which does just that! -
predicts the Tories will
BOSS it.

That's good enough for me.
stardust
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:52
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I think it lends itself more to a Haiku.

When psephology
takes in the geography
Apparently nothing's changed
Lib-Dem-Cyp-ree-en
Posted - 20 April 2017 13:56
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it's twitter and 24hr news cycles and whether an idea can be condensed into a 6 second soundbyte for the news.

Basically politics today is based on the High-Concept 1980s movies of Don Simpson & Jerry Bruckheimer et al. (Movies, coincidentally, so beloved of the stupid-right in the United States). As an aside, Mr Simpson - what an example of humanity he was.... The notion of a policy being explained in 4-6 words is ludicrous, but it's what we have.

This simplicity doesn't work with discussion, or nuance. So dogmatism is the simplest delivery vehicle. Yes/No or phuq off.

Brad's big donger
Posted - 20 April 2017 14:22
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That would be true if your only understanding of politics comes from you read on Twitter, and hear on the news. If you spend any time looking at what most politicians actually do you would come to a different conclusion.
Lib-Dem-Cyp-ree-en
Posted - 20 April 2017 14:49
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90% the population's understanding of politics comes from the news headlines, twitter, and the front page of their tabloid of choice.

the politicians make policies which suit that delivery.

freek daze
Posted - 20 April 2017 14:52
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It's a re-run of the Brexit referendum and presents the possibility, albeit a small one, that the Lib Dems might come in to lead a government with a mandate from 20-30% of the population, sack off the referendum and keep us in Europe. The pissfuniness and wailing and gnashing of teeth that would unfold in that scenario makes it worth fighting for.
Barnsbury
Posted - 20 April 2017 17:29
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the news is pretty boring.

In the morning: "In a speech to be given this afternoon to British Spaz plc, Jeremy Corbyn will say x, y and z".

In the afternoon "At a speech to British Spaz plc earlier today, Jeremy Corbyn said x, y and z".

Repeat until 8 June.
Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 17:41
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More, even, than that.

Morning: The Prime Minister will today speak to forklift drivers at British Spaz plc in Solihul

Mid morning: you join us live in Solihul where the Prime Minister is meeting forklift drivers. Here she is, wearing a hard hat and driving a forklift.

Lunchtime: the Prime Minister today drove a forklift in a hard hat and delivered a speech on the importance of lifting the economy (geddit?). In other news, this afternoon the Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn will be addressing a rally in Chopper, Lancashire. The leader of the opposition will say...

Teatime: You join us here in Lancashire where the Labour Leader is about to address a large rally of 30 people waving LABOUR WORKING HERE banners handed out with tenners by a man in a van. And here he is now...standing in amongst the crowd and quite shouty

"Good afternoon Chopper. I want to tell you a story of why I vote labour why you vote labour and why we must all vote labour to defeat the dangers of forklift drivers delivered to you after years of Tory misrule. We didn't fight the French in the War just so the rich could get richer and the privately educated could wee on the rest of us from their castles. What this country needs is an NHS which educates our children..er... and schools which care for the sick ... hang on.. This Tory Government has given us cuts and a bloody nose and what can we do about it? We can't get to the hospitals because they are closing and we aren't educated enough to work out what else we should do about it....erm... So if the kittens Fits You Must Acquit!!"

Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 17:45
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and with that, back to the studio.

Anchor: Janine O'Handjob there in Chopper. We have with us in the studio the veteran UKIP MP Douglas Carswell. Douglas, you've seen it all before for many years and from many angles. What do you think it all means?

---

Anchor: Ah, Well I'm sorry about that. We did have Douglas Carswell with us but he seems to have moved on. Instead here's Jenny Tittinger with the weather boobcast. I mean foreskin. Cast. Forecast skin. Forecast.
Shami's Chakra botti
Posted - 20 April 2017 18:12
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Anchor: and now to our Politics Editor, Norman Kuntzlik, who is on the campaign trail.

Norman: thank you, yes you join me here in the Turdington constituency in Birmingham where I am joined by two local businessmen. Faisal Hussein who is a local property owner and Dave Gurner, a former assembly worker who has now been unemployed for 73 years. Faisal first, if I may, which way will you be voting in June?

Hussein: conservative of course. I respect Teresa May. She will be good for the economy.

Norman: and Dave?

Gurner: yeah?

Norman: who gets your vote?

Gurner: dunnao rerleh. That burd with the massive tits probableh. maybeh keep her in for another week like, and make er do another bush tucker trial and then see. dunno.
dudeman
Posted - 23 April 2017 16:48
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There are actually some good posts on this thread.
Cofferdam
Posted - 23 April 2017 17:45
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this indeed is a fantastic thread.

Five days on since the announcement it is becoming dire now.