Thanks to all the readers who have thrown their two cents into the Nigel Farage offensive limerick competition.
Clearly the legal profession has very little love for the man - more entries were sent in than we can print. But the winner, solely for the superb rhyming of "Nigel", is James:
There was once a sleazebag called Nigel
Who watched porn at work with KY gel.
IT had to block it,
Tie him to a rocket
And watch the twat migrate to Rigel.
Here are a few of the better efforts over the last couple of days:
Have you seen this prick's new poster?
To National Socialism, it couldn't be closer.
But it's fear of reugees
That's the real disease
And Nigel we should boot out the border.
Penning lim'ricks on Nigel is hard,
A fine challenge even for the Bard,
For his world views - obscene -
Force me to break rhyme scheme,
So fuck Nigel Farage, the stupid piece of racist shite.
This anonymous effort:
The spivy ol fella Farage
Was leading the right wing charge
He went over to Brussels
With piss, wind and no muscles
Demanding an airstrike on the Haj
3 Ducks gets a mention for pointing out my own inadequacies:
As one of the liberal elite
Young Rhodes was full of conceit
He created a barrage
Of abuse against Farage
But ended up looking effete
And Anna cleary had time on her hands:
An odious old git named Farage
Urged race wars from the Thames on a barge
Said some Brits, "We'd Brexit
But he really wrecks it,
With his unique brand of wank'rage
Farage is a curious hit
With current polls saying Brexiteers bit
On his xenophobic MOs
Hope the 23rd shows
Him up as he is, piece of kittens
An arse by the name of Farage
Gains support through 'pub chum' reportage
Appeal bizarrely intense,
But supporters so dense,
Let's hope all they manage is ballot spoilage